As I write this, there is a movie playing on HBO called “Falling
Down.” It’s a story of an impotent man who — after he decides he’s “had
it” with everyone and everything — abandons his car in the middle of
rush hour traffic and decides to walk home. During his journey, the man
encounters attacks by various and sundry street creeps, all of whom he
manages to dispatch with (amongst other weapons) a baseball bat, a
hunting knife, as well as a satchel full of automatic weapons that he
manages to accumulate.
The filmmakers were smart. We all empathize with the protagonist
(he’s referred to only as D-FENS — his license plate number). Thus, as
he makes his way back home, we cheer along as he dispatches anybody who
gets in his way (this means everybody from a couple of old duffers
playing golf, to some CalTrans workers, to a gang of street thugs).
D-Fens is an embodiment of our collective rage; thus, his every deed is
Actually, I’ve seen the film before. Several times, to be honest.
It’s good escapist fare. However, tonight, the only reason I turned it
on was to escape the plethora of babbling politicians, psychologists,
attorneys (and anybody else, with “an opinion”) who are currently
offering their “wisdom” on the Littleton, Colo., massacre.
Of course, I’m sure that most of these knowledgeable souls would find
“Falling Down” to be part of the “cause” (that durn ol’ media violence!)
of the massacre.
Perhaps this is so. I don’t really know. Nor do I care. In my humble
P.O.V., it’s irrelevant.
Unfortunately, just about everything that’s being said by the circus
of TV anchors and their oh-so-willing guests is not only irrelevant,
it’s bulls–t. I swear, if I hear one more yokel in a cheap suit yapping
about gun control or media violence or — worst of all — asking that
most insipid of questions — “Why?” — I’m gonna puke.
To be perfectly honest, these people make me want to get hold of an
automatic weapon (all I’ve got at the moment is my trusty .45) and mow
them down — one by one. And if that makes me a psychopath or a
sociopath (the favorite terms being applied to Harris and Klebold by the
good folks in the psychological community), then, so be it.
By last Friday, I had purchased my ticket to fly to Colorado. This
morning I called and cancelled the flight. Having covered both the O.J.
Simpson case and the Menendez murders, I’ve vowed to steer clear of
covering huge media events. But I’ll admit it — there’s something about
this story that has me hooked. Moreover, I truly think — despite all
the yap and yammer — that the heart of this thing hasn’t been touched
But I’m going to hold off my trip till the smoke clears in Littleton.
Then I’ll go do my sleuthing. In the meanwhile I’ve got plenty to keep
me busy. Thanks to the talents of my amazing webmistress — who can do
just about anything with a computer — I’m currently in possession of
literally hundreds of leads to follow up on. The best part is, I doubt
very much if anybody else has the material that I’m in possession of.
Despite the fact that AOL (and other mirror sites) pulled Harris’
website down shortly after the deed, we managed to get into the log
files on Harris’ server, thus giving us the ability to pull up the
addresses of virtually every single person who had accessed
, as well as the
URL’s of every single person he was in contact with (Forget it: the log
files are now gone).
I’m not prepared to say much at this point, but I’ll tell you this:
It’s a highly interesting array of people. And I’m not just talking
about a bunch of teenage computer punks. Uh, uh. I’ll simply say this:
anybody who still thinks this thing was the product of just two minds is
a fool. (If you want to know more, you’ll just have to wait till the book
Now let me get to the point of this column, which relates to the
question everybody’s asking about this tragedy.
In addition to that question being asked umpteen million times daily
by everybody and his brother, that single word had the honor of being
the cover blurb for both Time and Newsweek (which features
an astonishing poster-boy shot of Harris, who looks nothing like the
geek he does in the much publicized yearbook photo).
As some wise man once said, in order to get the right answers you
have to ask the right questions. “Why?” is NOT the question. In
point of fact, we ask “why” in order to avoid the issue. In other
words, the moment you ask “why” — what you’re doing is separating
yourself from the incident. Now you’re not a participant; you’re an
observer. You’re one of the “good guys” — somebody who is watching the
actions of the “villains” from the sidelines while you munch pretzels
and guzzle coke. “Why?” turns this heinous deed into entertainment.
Sorry, but I’m not about to let you get away with that.
Don’t worry, I’m not going to get cosmic here — though, clearly this
is a “spiritual” issue. To treat it as a political or sociological issue
is fallacious. But spirituality doesn’t have to be airy-fairy or
mystical or pie-in-the sky. No — the only spirituality that I’m
interested in is nuts-and-bolts. Hardcore stuff.
So, for all you “why” askers, I’m going to tell you: not “why”
(because that’s the wrong question) but rather “how,” and “who.”
So, here’s the deal.
For approximately 90 minutes on the morning of April 20, Satan — in
the person of two teenage boys — strode through the halls of Columbine
High school, doing what he does best. Wreaking havoc. Spreading fear,
mayhem destruction and death.
The boys laughed as they fired their guns — their glee and their
bloodlust amping up with each fresh kill. They asked two of their
victims, “Do you believe in God?” One didn’t get a chance to respond
before his brains were blown out. But when Cassie Bernall was asked, she
replied (and this has rarely been reported in the media), “Yes I do, and
you should be following Him too.” Eric Harris put his gun up against
Cassie’s skull, and took her life. Then, the same young man who, weeks
earlier, had signed the yearbook of a fellow Columbine senior, “Ich Bin
Gott” (I am God) looked down at the bloody body and sneered: “There
Yes friends, Hitler was alive and well on the day of his birth, April
20, and though Klebold and Harris, as well as their mentor, are in the
ground — food for worms — the spirit who inhabited these people is
alive and well, right this very minute.
Whether it was because of a suicide pact, or because — as is now
being reported in the media (in my opinion to let the cops off the hook,
because of the abysmal job they did) — they couldn’t escape due to
heavy gunfire, at some point, the two murderers went back into the
library and, in an eerie imitation of the death of their mentor, Hitler,
killed themselves. (Harris fired a bullet into his mouth; Klebold died
of a single shot to the temple).
Now stop for a minute and think about how the devil works. He says,
“Come. Join my club and I’ll give you the world. I’ll make your wildest
dreams come true! I’ll make you feel gooooood!” And so you go
along with him. And, for awhile, he makes good on his promise.
But, at some point, the devil will do what he always does. He’ll turn
to you and say, “Guess what, fellas? Fooled ya!” Yep, just when you
think you’ve got it made, good ol’ Mr. Scratch gives you the finger and
sneers, “Welcome to hell, sucker.”
And so Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold shot themselves. And, as they
did, their Father, the devil, laughed uproariously. “Two more for the
gipper,” you can almost hear him saying.
In having Harris and Klebold kill themselves, the devil got a double
payoff. He not only stuffed two more souls into his soul bag, but he
took away the opportunity of everyone affected by this hideous deed to
rest peacefully. Our souls demand justice (if you want to call it
revenge, that’s fine by me). In any event (and every parent or relative
of a murdered person will confirm this), we need to settle the score.
And we’ve been robbed of that — forever.
The most poetic touch of all: the bloody deed was done on Hitler’s
birthday! And for good reason too. No, this was not a “symbolic” act.
Nor was it an accident.
What do you mean you ask? What I mean is quite simply this:
the same demonic spirit that inhabited Adolf Hitler, Charles Manson,
Jeffrey Dahmer, Richard Ramirez, and a host of other evil men throughout
history occupied those two boys on that bloody day.
Oddly, for several weeks preceding the Littleton Massacre, I’d been
researching Hitler for a piece I’m writing on cults. Like Harris and
Klebold — Hitler was a study in contradictions. One of the most
interesting things about Hitler (as described by one of his closest
compatriots) is that when he was “offstage,” so to speak, he had almost
“no personality.” He was, according to the friend, literally, a
“nonperson.” An empty vessel. Yet when Hitler was in front of a crowd,
giving a speech, “something” — the friend says — “would take him over
… something would speak through him.”
If you look at the more recent photos of Klebold and Harris, you’ll
see two very different people from the two geeks whose 10th grade
yearbook pictures were shown in those first hours after the murders.
You’ll see an entirely different quality… not just in the new
hairstyles (Harris, with his short spiky blond hair and icy blue eyes
could easily pass for one of the Hitler Youth Movement), but in their
very presence. A new confidence. An arrogance. It’s almost palpable.
A transformation was taking place in those two boys during the year
they planned for “NBK Day” as they referred to it in Harris’ diary. On
the day the deed took place — April 20, 1999 — the “transformation”
Studies show that demonic possession is not something that happens
all at once. Rather, it takes place in stages, sometimes over a period
of many years.
Picture an empty glass. We are filled — as we grow up — with
“experiences.” If we fill ourselves with good, pure things, the
likelihood is that when we are fully formed (and the brain of a
17-year-old is not fully formed) we will, more than likely, act
out of that well of these experiences. If we fill ourselves with poison
— as these boys did — we become “poisonous.” It is no great mystery.
We are computers. We are programmed. Our actions are borne out of our
If you take the position that the mind, body and soul are not three
separate things (science separates them for reasons of convenience),
then the picture is even clearer. As we continue to grow — if we fill
ourselves with the sickness that is around us — our mind/body/soul
becomes polluted. Unfortunately, today, this is almost unavoidable. The
world around us is polluted beyond repair … and unless those people
who we rely on to teach us (parents, teachers) make a concentrated
effort to shield us from the sickness that surrounds us, we will become
ill … polluted. At some point — if the process goes unchecked — the
evil reaches its watermark. And thus, you have an Eric Harris and a
Now, let me make an abrupt 90-degree turn. Over the past week, we’ve
heard not only from the multitude of psychologists, politicians and
lawmakers, but also from those good Christian folks who are anxious to
use this tragedy as an opportunity to show people the face of the Lord.
We’ve all heard the words: “healing,” “prayer,” “God’s love,” and “She’s
in a better place.” And we may think to ourselves, “Yes, this is a good
thing. It’s a chance for God to do his work.” And we feel, in that
moment, some sense of hope.
I’m sorry to have to say this, but it is not time to feel hopeful.
Not only have these words become cheap, they have become utterly
meaningless. Being a person who not only makes his living with words,
but who loves words and language, this is a painful observation to make,
but I truly believe it. Words no longer mean anything. Only behavior
This is not the time to be assuaged or comforted by words; nor is it
the time to feel hopeful. Rather, it’s a time for awareness, and in
order to be “aware” — to be able to see the truth of what is taking
place in the world — we are not allowed the luxury of “feeling good.”
One of the reasons that organized religion has failed — why many
people have stopped attending churches and temples — is because they
find nothing there but fluff … emptiness. Sure, you can go to a Sunday
service — sing, praise the Lord, get worked up — but if there is no
“teaching” taking place during that service, you’re doing nothing more
than engaging in spiritual masturbation. In the worst case — where you
have a roomful of people waving their hands in the air and talking in
tongues — what you’re witnessing is people who are hypnotized, and when
you’re in that state you’re actually much more open to the possibility
of being invaded by evil spirits than when you’re walking around with a
sound mind and body.
The blissed-out people in church are in the exact same state of mind
as the blissed-out people at a rock concert. After the service is over,
they may talk the talk, hug one another say “God Bless,” and all that
business. But, more often than not, these same good people go home, then
for the rest of the week they continue with “life as usual.” Which means
that daily they lie and cheat and steal. They may even beat their wives,
engage in illicit sex or watch porn movies after the family has gone to
sleep. Next Sunday they’re back in church. And on it goes. …
I’m not bashing Christians here. This same scenario takes place in
all religions. Read the newspapers. It won’t take you long to
find a story about a local rabbi, pastor or priest who’s been caught
having sexual relationships with young children in their congregation.
Happens every day. And even if you don’t read about it, it’s still
So I’m afraid that “religion” is not the answer. Not if you’re truly
serious about seeking truth. In fact (and I’m sure I’ll get scads of
ranting e-mails on this) I’d suggest that you stay out of churches and
Let me ask you this: Do any one of you dare argue that we are not in
spiritual warfare? The operant word here is “war.” If you agree, you
must understand that presently — that is, at this point in
chronological time — we are in a “battle mode.” And when you’re in a
battle mode, it is not the time for soothing words. It’s not the time
for “healing.” It’s not time for “closure” — a word I must have heard
over a hundred times this past week. (“We’re just looking to get closure
on this thing”).
Brother, you don’t WANT closure. Closure means “escape from pain.”
Pain is the teacher we need to listen to right now. We need to leave the
wound open — it will scar over when it’s ready. Right now pain, fear,
anguish, doubt — these God-given emotions have something to tell us.
And we need to be quiet and listen. Learning to listen is the beginning
of true understanding. Understanding does not come from the mere
repetition of words and phrases. Understanding has nothing to do with
acquiring more “knowledge.”
Even (so-called) “saved” Christians will have to admit that after
you’re saved, the battle is not over. In fact it’s just beginning. You
may be “saved” (if you believe in that concept), but you must still
fight “the flesh.” In fact, after the “salvation experience” most
Christians will come under much more harsh attack from the enemy.
We all know “fallen Christians,” right? So “salvation” is not a
panacea. Rather, it is an invitation to go on the front lines of
spiritual warfare. Judaism (which does not accept the concept of
salvation), believes that we must constantly strive to imitate the
behavior of a Holy God. If one truly follows the tenets of Judaism, one
has to “work” at being good every day. Because evil is both in us and
around us at all times, we have to “practice” goodness. As for evil —
we don’t need any practice. It comes naturally.
One of the most effective programs that ever existed within the
prison system was a program called “Scared Straight.” Some years back,
they made a documentary about this, and if you can locate it, I
recommend it highly. The “Scared Straight’ program was conceived of and
run by a group of hardened criminals — all lifers — who had turned
their lives around. Their mission now was to go one-on-one with the
young criminals who’d been recently incarcerated
But there was nothing pretty or comforting about their techniques in
dealing with the young brothers. During these encounters, the older
prisoners didn’t talk about “God’s love,” or put their arms around the
young men and tell them everything would be OK. Instead, they screamed
at them; they berated them; they taunted and bullied them; they
humiliated them … they shoved them and pushed them and roughed them
up. Literally, their gig was to “scare them straight.”
It was a frightening show to watch. The second half of the
documentary showed the men who’d been through the program five years
later. If I recall correctly, there was almost an 80 percent success
rate. The “Scared Straight” program was found to have been one of the
most successful programs ever to exist in the prison system. More young
criminals actually turned their lives around because of this “Tough
Love” approach than through any other methodology.
Whether or not it still exists, I don’t know, but what I’m saying is
that we need to use a “scared straight” approach with our youth today.
I’m talking about discipline, corporal punishment … the whole nine
But before we can teach others, we must ourselves change. And,
unfortunately, that’s something nobody wants to do. But I’m telling you
that unless you do this, you’re going to lose this battle.
You need to turn off your TV’s and your radios. You need to get
“entertainment” out of your life (that includes your favorite “religious
program “). You need to BE QUIET (try it; you’ll hate it). You need to
learn to sit with yourself and listen. If you actually do this you’ll
find that you become very uncomfortable. You don’t like being alone with
your thoughts. Most amazingly, if you do this, you will soon see that
you are not separate from this thing called evil. It’s a horrible thing
to experience, but unless you do, you’re useless as a spiritual warrior.
We don’t need brain scans or medical histories in order to understand
Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold. These two kids were neither especially
interesting nor unique. In truth, they were terribly mundane. There are
a million Eric Harrises and Dylan Klebolds out there — right now, this
very minute. Disaffected kids who are at that stage in life when they
feel immortal, when they’re subject to grandiose thinking, when their
stupid ugly little egos are so inflated that what people think of them
is the single most important thing in the world. (Stop for a
moment and realize that this whole killing spree began because these
kids felt like they weren’t “cool.”)
Today, as the year 2000 creeps up on us, we have created a mutant
generation of young people. Again, this is not mythology or sociology.
It’s fact. Just look around you. For those of us who grew up in the ’40s
and ’50s — the era of Eisenhower, Elvis, and the Mickey Mouse club — I
would venture to say that if our brains were examined, they’d find that
we have actual different brain structures than do the teenagers of
Look at them. Check out the morph that’s taking place. Kids today
actually look physically different. I’m not just taking about haircuts
and clothes or tattoos or pierced noses or ridiculously steroided
bodies. No, there is something different in the faces. If you don’t
think so, pick up the Newsweek photo of Eric Harris and look at
him. It’s all in the eyes. Check them out. You’ll see arrogance; you’ll
see hatred; you’ll see all kinds of things. And if you look closely,
you’ll see something else — something unnamable. Something inhuman.
That unnamable thing has existed since the beginning of time. It has
occupied — and in some cases — taken over the minds, bodies and souls
of certain men throughout the course of history. Last week, on Hitler’s
Birthday, that thing — which had taken up residence in the bodies of
two boys in an upscale community in Colorado — showed its true face,
its intent and purpose in this world: to maim, to kill and to destroy.
I guarantee you that before this millennium is upon us, we will see more
such acts. Pass all the gun laws you want; put in all the metal
detectors till you’re blue in the face. Ban “Doom” and outlaw “Natural
Born Killers.” It doesn’t mean a thing.
I think I’ve said enough. If at this point, if you find you are still
asking “why?” I’ll make it easy for you. I’ll give you the answer to
The answer is — “look.”
If you’re got enough guts and fortitude to actually do that, then
perhaps you have a shot at survival.
For those of you who are interested, Harsh Reality Productions is
offering a “CONFIDENTIAL REPORT ON THE COLUMBINE MURDERS. The
report includes the full text of Eric Harris’ “The Book” taken from his
website. “The Book” includes Harris’ step-by-step instructions for
making the bombs used in the killings, as well as Harris’ thoughts while
putting together his arsenal. It also includes two different drawings
(including the by now famed “Doom Drawing,” as well as “The Pink
Drawing” (linked from a homosexual website), which were posted on
Harris’ website. (A Jungian analyst would have a field day with these
pics). In addition to the text and the artwork, the report includes an
in-depth analysis of Harris’ writings, as well as my own notes and
If you wish to obtain a copy of the CONFIDENTIAL REPORT ON THE
COLUMBINE MURDERS please send $16.00 plus $3.50 S&H) to Harsh
Reality Productions, PO Box 8268, Calabasas, CA, 91372 If you want
to ensure that you get a copy of this report (we have a limited number
of copies), you may call 1-888-257-2656, leave your name and the date of
your call. Just say “Confidential Report” and we will reserve your copy
and prioritize your order, so that it will go out the moment we receive
Over the coming weeks, Harsh Reality Productions may release further
documents to the public regarding the Columbine Murders. We would advise
you to check back here to stay abreast of
forthcoming materials. You are also welcome peruse our bookstore,
which contains a
multitude of titles on “counter-culture” subjects. These are books which
you will NOT find in your local Barnes & Noble. If there is a particular
title or subject matter you are seeking, please send an email to:
Finally, for any of you who are interested in the concepts discussed
in this article, and would like more information, please send an email
to: [email protected]