If the 1,000 days of John F. Kennedy’s administration were “Camelot,”
then the Clinton-Gore era is “Scamalot.”

As much as I’d like to claim credit for this designation, I can’t.
Washington attorney Jim Guirard came up with it. He believes it needs to
be drilled into the heads of the American people so historical
revisionists will not be able to build a false legacy around their
political heroes.

You’re all familiar with the scams, but let’s review:


  • Whitewater


  • Savings and loan/Resolution Trust Corporation


  • Tyson/cattle futures


  • Castle Grande billing records


  • Gennifer Flowers denial


  • Juanita Broaddrick denial


  • White House Travel Office


  • Hillary health-care


  • Vincent Foster office records and cover-up


  • Paula Jones denial


  • FBI files


  • Lincoln Bedroom fund-raising


  • Coffees-for-dollars fund-raising


  • Hide-the-LaBella/Freeh memos


  • John Huang/Lippo fund-raising


  • Monica Lewinsky denial


  • “Money Trie” fund-raising


  • Ron Brown trips


  • DNC/China fund-raising


  • Hubbell hush money


  • Babbitt/Indian casino fund-raising


  • China missile technology transfers


  • Kathleen Willey sexual harassment


  • 1 million missing e-mails


  • Porn-gate cover-up


Of course, that’s just the tip of the iceberg. This is what
Clinton and Gore would like you to forget. They’ll tell you, “It’s the
economy, stupid!” Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.

Some people might make the mistake of thinking that the Age of
Scamalot is coming to an end on Jan. 20, 2001. Maybe. Maybe not. There
are two campaigns under way designed to continue it — Al Gore’s and
Hillary Clinton’s.

Hillary is in a class of her own when it comes to Scamalot. Think
about these:


  • “I’ve always been a Yankee fan.”


  • “As a youth I spent time in Elmira.”


  • The “listening tour” campaign.


  • “Partial Jewish heritage.”


  • “I favor clemency for Puerto Rican terrorists.”


  • “I oppose clemency for Puerto Rican terrorists.”


  • “We never really discussed Puerto Rican terrorists.”


  • “I apologize for opposing clemency for Puerto Rican terrorists.”


  • Terry McAuliffe’s “routine mortgage guaranty.”


  • Campaigning at public expense.


  • The Suha Arafat “inaccurate translation.”


  • “Jesus was a homeless child.”


  • “I’ll never leave Bill.”


  • “The vast right-wing conspiracy.”


And then there’s Gore. Remember these gems?


  • “I was a farm worker.”


  • “I was a home builder.”


  • “I got a bunch of people indicted and sent to jail.”


  • His dying sister and tobacco ruse.


  • “Tipper and I were the inspiration for ‘Love Story.'”


  • “I discovered the Love Canal.”


  • “I’ve always been pro-choice.”


  • “No controlling legal authority.”


  • His combat experience.


  • “The Buddhist Temple community outreach.”


  • Global warming


  • Ozone hole


  • “I invented the Internet.”


  • “I’m an Alpha male.”


  • “I invented the earned income tax credit.”


  • “Reinventing government.”


  • “I have never lied.”


  • “I live on a farm today.”


  • “I co-sponsored McCain-Feingold.”


  • “I sponsored the Environmental Justice Act.”


  • “I wrote the Superfund legislation.”


  • The iced-tea defense.


  • “We balanced the budget.”


  • “We reformed welfare.”


  • “The trouble is Big Oil.”


  • “Texas is the most polluted state.”


There’s a pattern here. There’s a common thread running through
the tactics of Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton and Al Gore. These are the
tactics of Scamalot:


  • Tell a big lie often enough and some people will believe it.


  • Make categorical false denials and you’ll get some face time on


  • Make qualified false denials and some people won’t recognize that
    you are parsing words.


  • Demonize your opponents.


  • Intimidate and smear witnesses and accusers.


  • Shred the evidence.


  • Lose or delay subpoenaed materials.


  • Use the “no specific memory” defense.


  • Suborn perjury.


  • Cultivate media spin and spikes.


  • Anything you disagree with is a “partisan political attack.”


  • Use presidential immunity improperly.


  • Use executive privilege improperly.


  • Use first lady privilege improperly.


  • Use lawyer-client privilege improperly.


  • Promise to tell all, but never do.


  • “Everybody does it.”


  • Employ guilt by association.


  • Use hush money and hush jobs.


  • Create international crises.


Are these complete lists? Hardly. Eight years later, it would
take several volumes to catalogue the fraud, the deception, the lies.
But this is a taste. And it ought to be enough to remind every single
thinking American of what we have been through.

Now, in conclusion, let me employ one of the other favored scams of
the Clinton regime: “Isn’t it time we put all this behind us?”

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