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Corrupter in chief: A modern fairy tale

Gather round, kiddies. … Uncle Pat wants to tell you a crazy fairy tale before he tucks you in, OK? I hope it won’t keep you from going to sleep, though.

Once upon a time, not long ago really, there was a beautiful, shining, prosperous land, a country that was the envy of the world. The people in this land were good, hardworking and happy people. They loved their families and looked for ways to help their neighbors, whenever they were in some kind of need or trouble.

Because it was a naturally fruitful land, and because the people worked hard, they prospered. They grew so much food of all kinds that they supplied other countries that weren’t so fruitful and prosperous. They were a sharing and generous people who often took on the problems of other countries when they really didn’t need to – they were just generous that way.

And oh, my – the inventions they came up with! The telephone, the automobile, airplanes, television and radio, computers and the Internet! On and on, the people had the freedom to invent and share and sell their products to just about everybody else in the world!

The ultimate expose on the radical nature of our 44th president: “The Manchurian President: Barack Obama’s Ties to Communists, Socialists and Other Anti-American Extremists”

You know what really made them so different, and so happy, for over 200 years? It was a blueprint, a plan for living, that the early settlers in the land created – they called it the Constitution. This blueprint provided a way for the people to govern themselves, without a king or a dictator, to make their own rules through elected representatives and for every citizen to have an equal right to pursue happiness. No other country had a blueprint like this – it was truly a marvel, and most of the ideas for it came out of the Holy Bible.

And so it was for so very long that most everybody else wanted to be like this country and its people.

But, like in most fairy tales, there were some bad guys. Some lived in other countries where they ruled everything, and even wanted to take over the good land. So there were some wars, but the good country managed to win and even share their ideas of freedom with the countries they’d been fighting. And the people were happy.

But not all the people.

Some thought they could come up with a better blueprint than that old Constitution. They wanted to change it, really to change everything. Instead of giving everybody an equal chance at happiness, they wanted the government to give all the people whatever seemed necessary to make them happy. Of course, that meant that all the citizens would have to pay for all that somehow, and the government would have to handle all the money and benefits, but they didn’t talk about that very much.

No, these “changers” used words like “new order,” “social justice,” “progress” and just plain “liberal.” The good-hearted people of this wonderful land liked the sound of those words, because they described good things. But how they would ever pay for all that – and that a different kind of controlling government would be necessary – was hardly discussed. In fact, the “changers” didn’t want that part of the new blueprint discussed.

It wasn’t freedom. It wasn’t liberty. It wasn’t even equal. It was a plan for the government, in the hands of a few, to determine what the people could have, and do, and how much they could keep from what they earned in their jobs. And this was not what the good citizens wanted, at all!

But one day, somehow, a man became the head guy of the land. He was elected by barely a majority of the people, because he was different, and charming, and he used all those good words. Sadly, the people didn’t really investigate the man or his background, and they didn’t realize he had no experience that prepared him to be their leader.

Before they really knew what was happening, this new “Changer in Chief” was appointing all sorts of suspicious men and women to help him run the government. These were “changers” from way back, people who had always wanted to change or throw out the old Constitution, and who wanted to make the good country into something totally different – with enlightened ones like themselves in control.

As the people began to complain, the “change team” forced all kinds of new rules on them; it signed their names to trillion-dollar checks they had no way to pay off; it took over businesses and fired the executives; it winked at millions of people flooding over the border illegally, even demanding that they be paid minimum wages for work they might do. The change team created new laws that made it hard for working people and small businesses to survive.

The Chief Changer declared to the world the good land was no longer “a Christian nation” – while he openly sought the friendship of people who hated the good land, while criticizing and offending its steadfast friend, Israel.

As the people frantically tried to resist all this “change,” they checked into the background of the chief – only to find out he might not even have been eligible to be chief, according to the old Constitution. Which of course might partly explain why he wanted to “change” that blueprint. And also why he spent millions to keep all his early records secret and hidden from the people.

And then serious problems arose, in which the country really needed a capable leader, a man with integrity, good judgment and experience. Floods, uncontrolled oil spills, a broken economy, wars and terrorist attacks, as well as 14 million border invaders, all called for everything this Changer was not.

He was commander in chief of the armed forces, with no experience whatsoever in anything military. The good country – the original “God Country” – was on the brink of bankruptcy, defeat and disaster.

How had this happened?

How? The people weren’t paying attention. They were too trusting in people who used “good words.” They liked the idea of “change.” And so they got a Corrupter in Chief.

How all this turned out will have to wait for our next bedtime story, kids. Sleep tight.