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Ode to TSA's antics draws hundreds of thousands

Posted By -NO AUTHOR- On 11/30/2010 @ 9:04 pm In Front Page | Comments Disabled

A new song that debuted on WND by Buck Howdy that takes a caustic look at the Transportation Security Administration’s newly imposed and enhanced body scanning and pat-down security processes is rocketing up the charts.

More than half a million people have watched the video version on YouTube, and viewers are signing on at the rate of thousands per hour. After passing that 500,000 mark early today, the total was approaching 520,000 a few hours later.

The parody by Steve Vaus, who has won both Emmy and Grammy awards, who has worked with the Olympics, Navy Blue Angels and World Series, who has recorded with Randy Travis and Kenny Rogers, and who has performed as “Buck Howdy,” is a takeoff on Kris Kristofferson’s famous “Help Me Make It Through The Night.”

He sings:

Take the ribbon from your hair
Shake it loose and let it fall
Leave your shoes right over there
Now get up against the wall

The comments on the YouTube video page ran in two tracks: a demand for profiling in the U.S. as a security measure, and general banter over the impact of the government’s program.

“Why is it that Americans are so sheepishly accepting this nonsense?” said one commenter. “The solution to this is obvious and simple: PROFILE!”

Said another, “All we need to do is profile.”

“Wanna fix it? Profile. Why? Because any cop will tell you, it works!” added a third.

In its debut on WND, it appeared first in audio form:

Listen to Steve Vaus’ new song now:


The full lyrics of “Help You Make it to Your Flight” are:

Take the ribbon from your hair
Shake it loose and let it fall
Leave your shoes right over there
Now get up against the wall

I’ll run my hands inside your thighs
Up your legs and out of sight!
But you can trust the TSA
To help you make it to your flight

We don’t profile that’d be wrong
Just ask the ACLU
We’d rather check your nooks and crannies
Every inch of you

Got no life except my job
But I don’t mind it’s all right
I get to grope you legally
If you want to take a flight

This badge and uniform we wear
Might look like a rent a cop
But your life is in our hands
We like it that way, especially if you’re hot

Awful lonely being me
No girlfriend, boyfriend, husband, wife
So let me squeeze you, oooh, right there
If you want to take a flight

You can trust the TSA
You’ll be in our dreams tonight

On his website, Vaus explains that he’s worked will Billy Ray Cyrus, Willie Nelson and Kenny Loggins, and was nominated four times for Grammy awards. He won in 2010.

For those who want to listen and purchase the song, it’s available online.

But he explains he takes greatest pride in the patriotic and spiritual music he’s created over the years.

It was in the period after 9/11 when he created “There Is an Eagle,” that zoomed to the top of the country charts.

Visit the artist’s website now.

At the time, he said, “There have been few times in my life when I felt absolutely compelled to write songs – as though I had no other choice – as though God was saying, ‘Look, this is what your purpose, your reason for living is.’”

“I felt that calling when I wrote ‘We Must Take America Back’ in 1992; when I wrote ‘Will You Be Among the Patriots’ in ’94; when I wrote ‘I Still Believe’ in ’97. But never more so than this past weekend,” he said of his creation of the “Eagle” song.

The 1992 song, “We Must Take America Back,” was the most requested song in many radio stations’ inventories after listeners chanced to hear it.

His newest target for satire, following a long career that included development of the character “Buck Howdy,” is the invasive levels of searching that have been mandated by the TSA at airports. U.S. Rep. Ron Paul has introduced legislation to make TSA officers liable for their actions, analysts have confirmed that the touching done by the government would be a crime if done by anyone else, there are organizations encouraging passengers simply to stop flying and lawsuits have been filed accusing the government of violating the 4th Amendment.

A YouTube video has been created documenting some of the TSA behaviors to which Americans are objecting:

Kristofferson’s original, “Help Me Make It Through The Night,” says:

Take the ribbon from your hair
Shake it loose and let it fall
Playing soft against your skin
Like the shadows on the wall

Come and lay down by my side
Till the early morning light
All I’m taking is your time
Help me make it through the night

I don’t care if it’s right or wrong
I don’t try to understand
Let the devil take tomorrow
‘Cause tonight I need a friend

Yesterday is dead and gone
And tomorrow’s out of sight
And it’s sad to be alone
Help me make it through the night

Yesterday is dead and gone
And tomorrow’s out of sight
I don’t wanna be alone
Help me make it through the night

I don’t wanna be alone
Help me make it through the night

Here is Kristofferson’s song, covered famously by Willie Nelson, in performance:



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