Rep. Ron Paul

WASHINGTON – A surprise speaker, Donald Trump, told a delighted audience at the Conservative Political Action Conference today that he would decide whether he is running for president by June.

But the initial enthusiasm for a Trump presidential candidacy soured instantly, when Trump insisted Rep. Ron Paul had no chance of being elected president.

“Ron Paul cannot get elected president, I’m sorry,” Trump said to a loud chorus of booing. “I like Ron Paul and I think he is a good guy, but he has a zero chance of getting elected.”

In response, someone from the audience yelled, “You’re fired!” – a clear indication the CPAC audience was not willing to accept Trump’s dismissal of the tea party-favored Ron Paul.

Then, launching into what appeared to be a preview of the case that he should be president, Trump bragged with a typical display of ego that he had earned billions of dollars during his lifetime, largely as a testament to his talents and abilities.

Trump then proceeded to argue that his success in business had qualified him to run for president.

“The scenario of a very successful person running for office is rarely tested because most successful people don’t want to go through the scrutiny,” he observed. “But this country is in serious trouble [and] we need leadership now.”

Trump also used the surprise CPAC speech as an opportunity to take a swipe at Barack Obama.

“Obama came out of nowhere,” Trump claimed. “In fact, the people who he went to school with never saw him.”

This, the Donald contrasted his well-known record of business achievement.

“I have a history of telling it like it is,” Trump insisted, “and I’m seriously thinking about running for president because the United States has become a whipping boy for world opinion.”

Trump laid the blame for the nation’s continued economic woes at the doorstep of the Obama White House.

“We have nobody who says to OPEC, ‘That price had better get lower, and it better get lower fast,'” Trump said, suggesting Obama has done nothing to jawbone or otherwise bargain with OPEC as the price of oil has escalated to over $100 a barrel.

“You have to tell OPEC that we are not going to pay $7 or $8 or $9 a gallon.”

Trump also said he was amazed leaving New York to travel to Washington for CPAC that he learned Germany was buying the New York Stock Exchange.

“I graduated from the Wharton School of Finance and military school, and this has shaped my business experience,” Trump recalled, suggesting the United States under Obama was slipping to a second-rate position economically, behind Germany in the EU and China worldwide.

“I am well acquainted with winning,” he insisted, implying Obama is a loser, “and what this country needs now is winning.”

Should he decide to run for president, Trump let the CPAC audience know he was in accord with conservative views.

“If I do run for president, I want you to know I’m pro-life,” he said. “I’m against gun control, and I will fight to end Obamacare and replace it with something that makes sense for people in business, something that will not bankrupt the country.”

He also insisted he was a fiscal conservative.

“If I decide to run, I will not be proposing to raise taxes,” he announced. “Instead, we will be taking in billions of dollars from countries that are now screwing us.”

He ended his speech to a standing ovation, proclaiming, “Our country will be great again.”

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