When Logic and Reason died – and no one notice

Perhaps you missed this small death notice, published recently on an obscure page of the Times:

“Logic and his twin brother, Reason, passed away quietly the same afternoon. They were found together in their nursing home, life-support equipment removed. Medical ethicists are reviewing the oversight.

“They died following a long life of devoted service to humanity. They were renowned for their service to the fields of science, pure mathematics and the dismal science, economics. They were also involved in politics, history and law. But their true love was in the area of education.

“Unfortunately, education had moved on, and their services were less and less in demand. Attempts to affix their names to buildings or other memorials have been resisted by school teachers and administrators, on the grounds that ‘No one around here knows nothing about their contribution. We ain’t never seen ‘em here in the college of education.’

“Logic and Reason were both children of Aristotle. They are survived by no known family or offspring. The Times regrets the earlier omission.”

Logic and Reason ultimately succumbed to the popularity of “Your Truth” and “My Truth.” These modern-day successors began life in academia, but have since gone viral on the Internet. They are now found in nearly all fields of modern endeavor, especially politics, the environment and climate science. Together they claim a joint following that exceeds those of Logic and Reason by orders of magnitude. Men and women everywhere are waiting as expectantly as their individual attention spans permit to see the contribution of these two rising stars to the human condition.

I bring this obscure obituary to the attention of Logic and Reason’s staunch adherents, especially those in the Republican Party. Many of you seem to believe that the Obama reign is destined to be brought to an end by the dismal facts and figures accompanying his years of “presidential usurpency.” Logic and Reason would certainly have agreed with you; but alas, they will vote for you only in Chicago, and only if you run as a Democrat.

Today, there is only “Your Truth,” which often differs with “My Truth.”

“My Truth” (as in those who will vote for the continued usurpency) is that perpetual handouts are the sign of a growing economy and the way to restore America to a healthy, vibrant, multicultural nation. As long as “Your Truth” is able to assemble an audience, however small, “My Truth” will be working the crowd, picking their pockets. After all, if you can afford to vote Republican, well, you must have something worth stealing.

Birth records for “Your Truth” and “My Truth” are sketchy, but they appear to be the bastard offspring of Liberty and License. When contacted for comment, both Liberty and License said their private affairs should not concern the public. They referred all inquiries about their offspring to their respective attorneys.