In the dung heap
at the Pearly Gates.
Editor’s note: Do you need something to smile about? Every day, WND selects the best joke offered up by readers and contributors to its Laughlines forum and brings it to you as the WND Joke of the Day. Here is today’s offering:
A man arrives at the Pearly Gates. He has to wait to be admitted, while St. Peter leafs through his big book.
St. Peter checks to see if the man is worthy of entry. He goes through the book several times, furrows his brow and says to the man, “You know, I can’t see that you did lots of good in your life, but you never did anything bad, either.
“I’ll tell you what: If you can tell me about one REALLY good deed that you did in your life, you’re in.”
The man thinks for a moment and says, “Well, there was this one time when I was drivin’ down the highway and I saw a biker gang assaulting this poor girl. I slowed down my car to see what was going on, and, sure enough, that’s what they were doing. There were about 50 of ‘em torturing this chick.
“Infuriated, I got out my car, grabbed a tire iron from my trunk and walked straight up to the leader of the gang. He was a huge guy with a studded leather jacket and a chain running from his nose to his ear. As I walked up to the leader, the gang formed a circle all around me.
“So I ripped the leader’s chain off his face and smashed him over the head with the tire iron. Then I turned around and yelled to the rest of them, ‘Leave this poor, innocent girl alone, you slime! You’re all a bunch of sick, deranged animals! Go home before I teach you all a lesson in pain!’”
St. Peter, extremely impressed, says, “Really? Wow, when did all this happen?”
The man replied, “Er … about two minutes ago.”