(Gawker) Jesse Scott Owen, a freshman at King’s College in Manhattan, was knocked unconscious in the street Wednesday when a futon guided by the invisible hand of a vengeful angel, fell on him from a height of “at least” 30 stories.

Gothamist hypothesizes that the mattress was blown off the rooftop of a nearby spa.

Owen, who moved to New York City from Florida three weeks ago, ignoring his grandparents’ warnings that a nice boy like him wouldn’t last one month in the big city without being felled by a mattress, could not have been more charming about the incident.

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