Is “Happy spring break” an acceptable Easter greeting these days?

Perhaps you are Jewish: “Happy spring break!” Well … uh, thank you.

Perhaps you are Muslim: “Happy spring break!” Yes, thank you so much!

Perhaps you are Hindu: “Happy spring break!” Yes, thank you. I will meditate upon that.

Perhaps you are Christian: “Happy spring break!” Why thank you! Jesus loves you!

“You religious bigot! Get the hell out of our country!”

Spring break is a secular masterpiece. (They’re still working on Christmas.) Spring break can be used to celebrate anything you want (well, except perhaps summer, fall, winter or Easter). Most often, however, spring break is an excuse to get parents to pay for travel for their college-age children to a hedonistic hotspot, where they can sample the latest drug and alcohol cocktails while picking up a sexually transmitted disease or two. Thanks, Mom and Dad, for paying for our education.

Well, boys and especially girls, that STD may be the most relevant part of your education these days. In college (and increasingly on downward into early grade school), you’ve been fed a garbage truck-sized load of social engineering by political zealots and labor union activists. These people are creatures of the taxpayer dollar, and they become more contemptuous of the source with each dollar they collect.

When your parents graduated from college, there were employers holding job fairs. As a nation, we actually made things. Today, you may pay for your own internship, and the government staffs booths to help graduates get welfare, disability or unemployment.

Increasingly, your expectation to collect a diploma and return home to live with Mom and Dad until you are 27 years old is viewed as realistic by the culture around you. (I think that is the time when you can’t be on your parent’s insurance anymore. Perhaps by then they’ve also paid down some of your student loans.)

At least from the STD, you learned that actions have consequences. Here are a few of the ones that are not quite so direct or immediate:

Your life will not be nearly as comfortable as that of your parents. The government in your state capitol and Washington, D.C., that your union proselytizers bowed down to and worshiped for more benefits is dead broke. Together, state and federal governments have already distributed your benefits and your children’s benefits to your parents’ generation. And that is before your parents get old and doddering and have to be taken care of by the state.

That dollar in your pocket (you do still get an allowance, right) today will be worth about 10 cents by the time you finally find a job and are into your career. (You are the ones who will get to pay back all those bonds that the Federal Reserve is creating out of thin electrons today.) Whoever controls the government at that time will tell you this is great news! You are getting paid way more than your parents were. What they won’t tell you that it’s even better news for them: Now you’re rich and can pay lots of taxes.

Of course things cost way more, too. Your friends just got a fixer-upper house in a run-down part of town for an even $1 million. Thanks to a 50-year mortgage, it is affordable, too. And the bank just loves them to death with that adjustable rate mortgage.

Perhaps if you can stay home long enough, you can simply take over your parent’s house? After all, they will need someone to care for them. And that modest little house they had is now worth nearly $5 million! Who would have thought?! We will never have to work again!

What do you mean inheritance taxes? We have to sell the house to pay the taxes? Where are we gonna live? Apply for welfare?

Happy spring break! Think of it as a time to celebrate the abolition of all the terrible things that Christianity did for America. Gone is the work ethic, moral restraint and the prohibition that the rich and powerful take care not to prey upon the weak and poor. Religious instruction and personal restraint enabled personal freedom and restrained government. Twenty-thousand drones in the sky will never put Humpty Dumpty back together again.

And always remember what you learned in school: All roads lead to where you are now. All except one. All except the cross. Something is telling me that it is too late for America. But it is not too late for you. Soon, however, it will be.

In reality, all roads lead to the cross. And from there, to God’s unfathomable love, or his terrible and eternal judgment. Happy Easter. You still have a choice.


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