State of the union
Editor’s note: Do you need something to smile about? Every day, WND selects the best joke offered up by readers and contributors to its Laughlines forum and brings it to you as the WND Joke of the Day. Here is today’s offering:
The governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the governor’s dog, then bites the governor.
The governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie “Bambi” and realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.
He calls animal control.
Animal control captures the coyote and bills the state $200 to test it for diseases and $500 to relocate it.
He calls a veterinarian.
The vet collects the dead dog and bills the state $200 to test it for diseases.
The governor goes to the hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for infections from the coyote and getting his bite wound bandaged.
The running trail is shut down for 6 months while scientists from the Department of Fish & Game conduct a $100,000 project to make sure the nature area is now free of dangerous animals.
The governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a “coyote awareness program” for residents of the area.
The state legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.
The governor’s security agent is fired for not stopping the attack.
The state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training regarding coyote behavior.
PETA protests the coyote’s relocation and files a $5 million lawsuit against California.
The governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks his dog.
The governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging.
The governor has spent $0.50 on a .45 ACP hollow-point cartridge.
The buzzards eat the dead coyote.
And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.