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We have all come to expect split decisions from the Supreme Court, but we don’t expect the four on the losing side to consist of Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Sonia Sotomayor, Elena Kagan and …Antonin Scalia! But there he was lurking with the three left-wing harpies when it came to the recent decision involving DNA.

In case you missed it, Alonzo Jay King had been arrested for assault. As part of the booking process, the cops took a swab of his cheek. The DNA test resulted in his being connected to a rape in Maryland for which he was subsequently tried and found guilty.

According to Scalia and the ACLU, the police had no right to swab his cheek because it invaded his right to privacy. That is exactly the sort of muddleheaded thinking that we have come to expect from liberals. Fortunately, the majority of the justices quite rightly decided that taking the smear was no more invasive than taking his fingerprints.

I can’t imagine what Justice Scalia has been smoking, but I have heard that he and Mrs. Ginsburg are extremely friendly, so one might leap to the assumption that the old gal has used her female wiles to cloud his judgment. One will have to wait and see if his derangement is temporary or terminal.

Speaking of females, if abortion is a women’s health issue, as Obama and his chums over at Planned Parenthood keep insisting, why isn’t carrying a concealed weapon a public health issue? After all, abortion leads to the taking of innocent lives, whereas a weapon in the right hands leads to the defense of innocent lives.

What liberals seem unable to grasp is that making schools, churches, movie theaters and malls gun-free zones guarantees that only criminals and lunatics will be armed in those venues.

Another bit of liberal malarkey has it that blacks are always in need of federal assistance because of slavery. What they choose to ignore is that slavery ended 150 years ago, and that 50 years have elapsed since the enactment of the Civil Rights Act. How is it that Jews, Italians, the Irish and Chinese all came to America, most speaking a foreign language, and faced discrimination when it came to housing, education and employment, but managed to overcome bigotry and succeed within a generation? And, more recently, how is it that Americans of Japanese ancestry were tossed into concentration camps during World War II, but quickly recovered from the insult and injury of losing not only their freedom, but their homes, farms and businesses?

While on the subject of minorities, I have never understood why Native Americans, as they apparently choose to be called, objected to having college and professional sports teams named the Indians, the Braves and the Chiefs. Considering the lifestyle so many have chosen for themselves by remaining wards of the state on reservations, would they really prefer to have the teams called the Sots, the Idlers and the Ne’er-do-wells?

Speaking of sots, idlers and ne’er-do-wells, it seems that the IRS spent $50 million on conferences during the past few years, the costs including $1,500-a-night hotel rooms and $60,000 videos parodying “Star Trek” and “Gilligan’s Island,” and still had enough left over for $92 million in employee bonuses between 2009 and 2013.

Experience more of Burt Prelutsky’s humor and wit in his books — at WND’s Superstore.

As proof that the White House had nothing to do with the IRS kerfuffle, Obama henchman David Axelrod claimed it was simply too stupid a scandal to be laid at the feet of Obama or any of his advisers. Oh, really? After recalling such brainstorms as Cash for Clunkers, the Unaffordable Health Care Act and Solyndra, I at least had to acknowledge that Axelrod delivers much funnier one-liners than Jon Stewart, David Letterman or Bill Maher.

What even Axelrod didn’t try to laugh away was the fact that although Hillary Clinton had only visited the White House 43 times in four years and Leon Panetta, 20 times, IRS Commissioner Douglas Shulman had been in and out 157 times. When you realize that, between fundraisers, vacations and golf outings, Obama only visited 78 times, you have to wonder if Shulman and Michelle have been carrying on an affair.

In case you ever doubted that college campuses are every bit as left-wing as MSNBC, a survey showed that only four Republicans were invited to be commencement speakers at the top 100 universities.

And while the likes of Charles Krauthammer, Ben Carson, Ted Cruz, Clarence Thomas, Ileana Ros-Lehtinen, Rush Limbaugh, Thomas Sowell, Bernie Goldberg, Kelly Ayotte, Dennis Prager, Hugh Hewitt, Michael Medved, Ann Coulter and Steve Hayes were probably relieved that they didn’t have to shlep out to some college, don a silly robe and stand in the sun, delivering one of those boring speeches sprinkled with words like “future,” “dedication,” “youth,” “hope” and “dreams,” I’m sure they would have appreciated being asked.

Speaking of being asked, apparently the price extracted by Bill Clinton in return for his lauding Barack Obama, whom he apparently despises, at the Democratic National Convention last year was that Obama would return the favor by endorsing Hillary in 2016. But the way Obama’s popularity is plummeting in the wake of all these scandals, Clinton must be kicking himself. And when his foot gets tired, I’m sure Hillary will be only too happy to take over.

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