Last weekend’s blizzard was not without its comic moments! (Posted on Facebook)

Big lizzard storm coming. Lizzard warning now in effect for Saturday. At least for those driving on the northern state Pkwy on Long Island.

Big lizzard storm coming. Lizzard warning now in effect for Saturday.
At least for those driving on the northern state Pkwy on Long Island.

And in the “uh-oh” category …

Fear of heights?

How would you like to walk across this bridge? China’s first glass-bottomed suspension bridge gives tourists a heart-stopping experience. The nearly 1,000-foot-long crossing in China’s Hunan Province dangles visitors nearly 600 feet above a valley floor.

Some fast facts: The bridge is suspended over a 590 foot crevice. It is made of one-inch thick glass. The walkway is said to be “terrifying.” People can barely make it across without freaking out. Some close their eyes, while others hang on for dear life. Some just sit while others crawl their way across it. At 984 feet, it is the longest bridge of its kind in the world.

If you’re crossing it, just remember, it is called “Brave Men’s Bridge” for a reason. And don’t look down!

Got floor plans?

Cool apps.

Hey all you DIYers (Do-It-Yourself-ers)! Found an app that draws floor plans all by itself. What!!! you say?

Yep. RoomScan Pro is an app wherein you just touch each wall with your phone, and measurements are estimated within six inches. Trade your tape measure for this app, which gives you your floor plan in seconds with approximate floor area and wall lengths. This app is really quite amazing. Tap a door frame, select from a variety of door types, and the app includes that info in the floor plan. All that for under $5. See how it works at locometrics’ website.

It’s not instinctive?

Even otters have to learn to swim! This video shows Mama Otter teaching her little pup. Did you know otters are not born knowing how to swim?

Have you ever wondered what that meant?

Have you ever wondered what certain song lyric words mean? Maybe you’ve been singing them for years and not known what the heck you were saying or what the songwriter meant?

In last week’s column I wrote about the 70’s rock group Eagles. (I still can’t get over that I presciently wrote the piece less than 24 hours before Eagles founder and lead songwriter Glenn Frey died … but that’s another matter.)

So, the other day I was humming the tune from their mega hit “Hotel California.”

“On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair … warm smell of colitas rising up in the air.”

Sound of screeching tires. Hey, wait a minute! I’ve sang that song for years, and don’t know what “colitas” are. What the heck are “colitas”?

So I stopped humming, did a search, and found an answer. What I discovered was something else on a dark desert website … no wait! I’m getting mixed up. (Too much colitas?)

At a website called “Straight Dope”, another curious Eagles fan asked about the word. In the master’s chambers … er, whoops … in the section titled “A straight dope classic from Cecil’s storehouse of human knowledge” (really!) was this shimmering light:

Dear Cecil: Just what does “colitis” mean? In the song “Hotel California” by the Eagles the first lines are, “On a dark desert highway, cool wind in my hair, warm smell of colitis rising up through the air.” I remember I tried looking it up at a university library years ago and couldn’t find the answer. I know songwriters sometimes make up words, but I didn’t see a Dr. Seuss credit on the album. – Wendy Martin, via the Internet

With all the seriousness he evidently could muster, Cecil replied:

Uh, Wendy. It’s colitas, not colitis. Colitis (pronounced koe-LIE-tis) is an inflammation of the large intestine. You’re probably thinking of that famous Beatles lyric, “the girl with colitis goes by.”

Cecil then went on to explain the various reasons that have been postulated over the years about songwriters Don Henley, Don Felder and Glenn Frey’s usage of the word “colitas.” (I’ll leave you to discover that for yourself at “Straight Dope.”)

At the conclusion of the post, Cecil responded to a related comment from nancrow, another lyric truth seeker:

Dear Cecil: Please tell me you were joking when you mentioned the Beatles lyric “the girl with colitis goes by.” You were joking, right? You know it’s “kaleidoscope eyes.”

Cecil replied:

Nothing gets by you, Nan. – Cecil Adams.

Welcome to the Hotel California, where you can check out any time you like, but you can never leave…

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