Bruno Mars is a talented guy and seems like he has a blast performing. And then there’s this song:

“Your Sex Takes Me To Paradise.”

The song is obviously referring to sex outside of marriage. And it’s a little blasphemous; he sings, “I’m born again every time you spend the night.”

While a few years old, it catches the sexual ethos our day. When I hear it (it’s been on auto-play in my head for three days), the word “paradise” stands out in stark contrast to the word “sex.”

Paradise is a tall, tall order. Jesus called heaven “paradise,” knowing we’d all instantly picture a place of ultimate beauty and joy and perfection. It’s a “catch-all” word that brings to mind the perfect place in everyone’s mind (sociopath mind not included).

Soooo … sex equals paradise? Just for grins let’s see if sex lives up to the hype. And none of that biblical sex stuff – just society’s rule, which means “no rules!”

Easy one first: Weinstein. And every other guy like him. More like hell for the women.

Except, the folks horrified by him also scream “no rules” at any Nazi-fascist-Taliban-morality-cop that dares set boundaries. You know – like Mike Pence.

Not paradise.

Shack up sex: Apparently NOT paradise since shacking up before marriage skyrockets the probability of divorce. No Disney movie “happily ever after.”

Not paradise.

One night stands: If “paradise,” it wouldn’t be just one night. And it would be disease free.

The year 2016 was the BEST (meaning highest number) for new sexually transmitted disease rates (We’re No. 1!). Thirty years ago, I thought we’d be star trekking around the galaxy on skateboards. Instead, we’re just using technology to increase promiscuity and disease.

Not paradise.

Gender Bending: All the rage today, so it must be paradise! And from news/social media/Bruce Springsteen, you’d think at least 75 percent of the population must be bending. Actually, it’s less than one-third of 1 percent.

The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-5) lists gender dysphoria as a mental disorder. And it has to be bad because transgendered people have an attempted suicide rate of up to 48 percent.

“That’s because of oppression!”

Really? How much more oppressed can you be than in chains? Yet at the height of slavery in this country, there was never any report of mass-suicide watches on plantations.

It’s actually quite easy to understand and sympathize with suicidal thoughts a person might have if he thinks he’s actually in the wrong body.

Not paradise.

Homosexuality: I’m a societal leper for even pointing this out since homosexuality is 100 percent celebrated in all media – and if you think gay marriage is wrong, Sen. Corey Booker is coming for you like a modern-day Joe McCarthy. Because he’s wiser than 5,000 years of religious history, Moses, God and Jesus.

But a summary of the 2016 NHIS survey (a government study published by Journal of American Medicine) says homosexuals “were more likely to report impaired physical and mental health, heavy alcohol consumption, and heavy cigarette use.” You can read more here, but bottom line – across all categories for men and women, risks increase, some by almost 100 percent.

Not paradise.

LAST ONE and our BEST HOPE: PORN! No other human emotions involved, no disease spreading (for the observer anyway), and it can be enjoyed in the privacy of your own home! Paradise at last!

Except according to Psychology Today, you will experience INCREASED isolation, INCREASED chance of divorce, and get this: DECREASED sexual satisfaction! Porn makes the sexual paradise Not … As … “paradisey.”

Bottom line:

God created male and female and designed them, so they fit together like puzzle pieces and become a whole. Don’t believe in God? OK – then consider this: All of the above will be evolved out – because it’s all damaging to the species. Survival of the fittest and all that.

And there is proof that the biblical design is excellent:

Rolling Stone magazine article, “The Joy of No Sex”: In 1994, “the University of Chicago released the most authoritative survey to date on American sexual behavior and created the first tremor of the current Christian sexual liberation. According to the survey … the people getting the most joy, pleasure and ecstasy from sex are Christian women in monogamous marriages – they’re physically and emotionally more satisfied with their partners and are more likely to have an orgasm every time they have sex than are people of any other religion or of no religion at all.”

Boom. Mic drop.

Sex is awesome! And God made it so.

But even done God’s way, it’s still nowhere near paradise.

C.S. Lewis is better than I in so many ways, and he clarified the ocean of difference between this world and paradise this way:

“If we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desires, not too strong, but too weak. We are halfhearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

God made sex so fantastic, but what He has in store for all who worship Him will far outweigh anything we experience on this earth. Enjoy what He’s given! Often! But don’t confuse it with paradise – instead, let it remind you of His kindness and His promise that what is to come is infinitely better than anything you can ask for or imagine.

Amen amen.

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