I have always wondered why it is that when I take a pair of headphones and place them neatly in a drawer, they mysteriously become a knot that cannot be pulled apart? Does this happen overnight? Where did all those knots come from? Knots are always inexplicably appearing. It is all a mystery to me.

Maybe your life is tied up in a knot right now. When you work at untying a knot, the question is often where do you start, because as you try to untie it, you can sometimes make it worse. That can be the case in our lives as well.

The good news is that God can take that mess, those knots in our lives, and he can straighten them out. There are times he will intervene in a situation, but there are also other times when he will ask you to be strong through it.

Sometimes God will allow suffering in our lives to get our attention. In David's familiar psalm, he wrote, "Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me" (Psalm 23:4 NIV). Have you ever wondered what that means? In this psalm, David is comparing himself to sheep, which is not really a compliment. Sheep are pretty low on the intelligence scale in the animal kingdom. They have a tendency to go astray.

In David's time, the shepherd had two tools that he used: a rod and a staff. The staff was a long, crooked instrument a shepherd used to move the wayward sheep back into line. And when the sheep went astray, he pulled them back with his staff. But sometimes a sheep wouldn't respond to the shepherd's staff, so the shepherd had to resort to using his rod. But it was better for a sheep to have a broken leg than to become leg of lamb.

Sometimes God will allow something dramatic to get our attention and bring us to where we need to be spiritually. The psalmist said, "Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I obey your word" (Psalm 119:67 NIV). Someone who found that to be true in her own life wrote me the following:

A person expects to lose a parent. Maybe even a brother, sister, aunt, or uncle, but never a child. My son would have been 16 years old today. It has been 15 years since his death, but he was the person that brought me to the Lord. Because of his death, I received my salvation. ... God knows my pain. He lost a son too. I found salvation through God's Son because of the loss of mine.

What can you say about something as tragic as this? God brought good out of bad – that is what you can say.

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But there are other things that can come out of suffering. It also can be used to prepare us for a special task. The greatest example of this is found in the Old Testament example of Joseph, who was mistreated by his brothers and sold into slavery for 20 pieces of silver. His father thought he was dead. But Joseph lived out the truth of Romans 8:28, which says, "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose" (NLT).

His brothers thought they would never see Joseph again, but God, through His providence, elevated Joseph to be the second most powerful man in the world. Not only that, but he was put in charge of the food supply in Egypt. So when a famine swept over the land and his brothers had to go to Egypt for grain, little did they know they were standing before their brother. With the passing of time, they didn't recognize the very one they had betrayed. And certainly they didn't expect to see him in that position. But Joseph recognized them and finally revealed his true identity. They collectively thought, "And ... we are dead." But then Joseph made this amazing statement: "But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive" (Genesis 50:20 NIV). He was essentially telling them, "Listen, brothers, I know your motives were wrong. But God used it, despite what you did to me."

The same is true for us. Even when bad comes our way, God can bring good out of the bad. Your suffering will not last forever. Whatever you are going through, it will have an end. It may not seem like that at the time. But as 2 Corinthians 4:17 says, "For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all" (NIV).

The experiences of your life also can be used to help others. When you have suffered, you can offer a special measure of help to someone else who has suffered. For example, if you are a cancer survivor and you have a conversation with someone who has just received a cancer diagnosis, you can speak to them and comfort them like no else can, because you have been there. You know the emotions. You know what it is like. You know what the treatments are like. And yet you are able to say, "Here is what the God has done for me. ..."

If you have lost a child, you can comfort someone else who has lost a child like no one else can. If you are disabled, you can speak to other people who are disabled like no one else can, because you are experiencing similar circumstances. You can say, "Here is what God has done with me and for me and through me. And here is what I have to say to you. ..."

I wish we could have pain-free lives, but we are not in control of that. God is. And he can use your experiences in life, both good and bad. So don't waste your pain.