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MEXICO CITY – Talk about a man without a country.

Back in the United States, those who tremble at the sight of a rapidly-changing America constantly demand that I drop the hyphen and stop referring to myself as Mexican-American. Whether concerned that my loyalties may be divided between my grandfather's country of Mexico and my own – the United States – or simply annoyed at their assumption that I refuse to assimilate, they issue an ultimatum: Call yourself American or "go back to Mexico."

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Sounds fair – if a little illogical. After all, if the fearful really view me as an American in the first place – as they claim – then why are they so eager to deport me? Two hundred twenty-five years after the Declaration of Independence, this is where the United States' unresolved dialogue over national identity has brought us: "Be American, you Mexican."

Well, now that I have gone to Mexico – as part of a delegation from The Dallas Morning News invited to interview top officials of the Vicente Fox administration – some Mexicans are making their own demands. It turns out that they are just as offended by hyphens as their northern neighbors. What exactly am I trying to prove by claiming an allegiance to the United States? Why not honor the memory of my immigrant grandfather, call myself "Mexican," and leave it at that? Why not accept, even celebrate, Fox's magnanimous offer to serve as a sort of surrogate presidente and shepherd for me and the 20 million other Americans of Mexican descent? Accusing me – and my compatriots – of nursing an identity crisis (how did that happen?), at least one Mexican thinks that I should get professional help

"Man, you need a therapist," a Mexican-born journalist and colleague tells me half-jokingly over tequilas and mole in one of this city's finest restaurants.

A student of the human condition, my friend is baffled by what he perceives as the insecurities that haunt most, if not all, Mexican-Americans. On this day, what set him off was my casual use of a single word – "lawbreakers" – that has nothing to do with identity or nationality but much to do with U.S. immigration policy. I had speculated earlier as to how the American people – and political system – might react to the aggressive, new hard line from the Fox administration demanding the equivalent of amnesty for about 4 million to 5 million undocumented Mexican immigrants living in the United States. I had predicted that many Americans would have trouble swallowing the "forgive and forget" approach, seeing amnesty as a political maneuver that mocks their nation's right to protect its borders and rewards "lawbreakers."

That was it. Lawbreakers. The word offended my friend – who, like me, knows and respects countless Mexican immigrants in the United States who, while undocumented, still manage to work hard, preserve their family values and contribute to both the U.S. economy and society as a whole.

Immigrants, regardless of how they get to the United States, are one of the very best things about the country. And instances where they are scapegoated, exploited, picked on and – as they increasingly are now – victimized by hate crimes must not be tolerated.

But how else should we refer to someone who conspires with a smuggler to cross a barbed wire fence, evades infrared cameras and border guards and then lurks in the shadows to avoid detection and punishment – all in a flagrant attempt to circumvent U.S. immigration laws? To most people, that sounds like a lawbreaker. But, of course, illegal immigrants are hardly alone in their life of crime. Other lawbreakers include the American company that knowingly employs an illegal immigrant force and the middle-class American family that, intending to make their lives easier, hires and even shelters illegal immigrant housekeepers, baby sitters and gardeners – all in violation of U.S. law.

But if the lawbreaking is real, then so is the identity crisis that my Mexican friend detects in his Mexican-American brethren. They are not alone in wrestling with ambiguity.

Countries, too, sometimes have trouble determining their identity. The United States swears that it doesn't want immigrants who cross our borders illegally. Yet it knows they are lured to cross by the promise of jobs. Mexico swears that it wants its citizens to come home, then demands amnesty in the United States to make it easier for them to stay.

This is not limited to just the United States and Mexico. All over the world, people on the move are crossing borders and forcing nations to confront issues of identity. The question is not whether the United States has enough immigrants. It is whether the world has enough therapists.