Age in the aftermath

40.

The very thought of that number used to send shivers up and down my spine.

40.

It's a solid, BIG number in the age game. And this week it will be mine.
All mine.

TRENDING: Caught red-handed

Unfortunately mine – at least that's what I once believed, before the
dreadful events of Sept. 11.

I wonder why I was ever so bothered by the thought. For nearly a year I
struggled with that number – churning it over and over and over in my
mind: "40. 40. 40. 40." I remember when my mother turned 30. Gosh, she was
old. I remember when my father turned 40 – he was ancient!

As I've struggled like so many others to make sense of the terrorist tragedy
that destroyed so many lives, I find myself mourning the fact that none of
those murdered will ever again enjoy – or dread – a birthday. I think of
the young mothers, the young fathers, the spouses and children they leave
behind. I think of those who will never have the blessing of celebrating 40
years of life. Many will never even know what it's like to reach 30.

Perhaps our media will learn a valuable lesson about aging through our
national nightmare. Maybe, just maybe, we'll begin to understand that life
is precious, and that having the opportunity to age is also precious. Only
the living age. It's so basic, so simple, yet such a hard concept for our
culture to grasp.

In a society that is largely driven by the media (movies, billboards,
television, radio, commercials, etc.) 40 is very old. We are constantly
surrounded by images of firm, youthful, even flawless figures. The stars
in the movies and on the sitcoms are young and beautiful. The images in
magazine ads represent only the perfect. If one uses these images as a
measuring stick, one will always come up on the short end.

Most average citizens have always been disturbed that ads package only the
young as beautiful. What truly bothered me in the mid-1990's was the new
youth "spin" the media took – it was far worse than the myth of youth having
a monopoly on beauty. The media culture began to promote youth as the wise
ones.

Remember the big Internet boom? Remember all the articles about how smart
these young Internet mavericks were? The great heroes of the stock market!
Twenty-something millionaires! These young, brilliant minds were the stars
of the land. We were led to believe that if you were over 30, forget
it. You were washed-up and dried-out. No potential there. The media was
driving the lie that only the young had vision, ideas, energy and
excitement.

The entire culture threw out the virtue that, more often than not, true
wisdom wears wrinkles. It completely ignored the fact that stability and reflection and experience are attributes that can be attained only through the passing of time. But thank God, this most sickening portrayal of the gods and
goddesses of youth crashed and burned when the bottom fell out of the
Internet stocks. As painful as it was to investors when the tech stocks
started falling, it was a healthy time for America. Why? Because it gave us
a much-needed reality check. Because it reminded all of us that life
experience is important. Because it put an end to the hype over unproven
business plans, get-rich-quick tech schemes and youth-equals-brilliance
garbage.

Don't get me wrong. I have spoken scores of times to youth groups and
organizations around the country about the marvelous potential they enjoy
because they are young. It's important to encourage, inspire and help our
youth catch a vision for the incredible contributions they can make to
society, to the wonderful lives they can live if they make wise choices.
But it's also important to let them know how wonderful it is to grow older.
And what a blessing each and every day of life can be, if approached with the
right perspective. We need to remind them of their own mortality – to let
them know just how precious life is. And we also need to remind the elderly
of these truths. It's important to encourage those who are "old," and often
alone and sick, that they still have much they can contribute too. As we
reflect on the massive number of individual lives taken in a single moment
last week, hopefully our minds will make the connection that regardless of
our age, every second of the life we enjoy is to be valued.

Whether one is 40, 70 or even 100, age has its advantages. There are
lessons to be learned from those who are older, lessons to be shared with
those younger, and truths to behold which can only come from a peaceful
trusting in God. When I look back on how quickly the years have passed from
age 20 to 40, I know that only if I'm very lucky, I'll very soon be writing
a piece on what it's like to turn 60. Hopefully, if I do have that
opportunity, I'll reflect on the last 20 years and see that my years were
spent in doing something truly important: sharing what I have learned about
life and faith with those around me.

So this week, as I turn 40 while our nation still grieves over so many
deaths, I will be grateful to be alive. I will spend my birthday
celebrating life, and praying for the families of those who are mourning
life lost. And I will remember that when I am gone, whether it is this
year, or ten years from now, or 50 years in the future, the only thing that
will truly matter is whether or not I loved God with all of my heart, and
loved others as I love myself. I will remember that love is not just a
feeling – that true love involves action.

I will remind myself that true
love seeks to cast out fear, brings hope to the hopeless and always
rejoices in truth. 40 never looked so good.