Nervously twiddling my thumbs while awaiting the imminent-impending-inevitable discovery of Weapons of Mass Destruction in Iraq any day now – which the Bushwa administration assures us will be found, and soon, because that’s why we went to war, isn’t it – I decide to delve deeper not into how many ways can Tom Daschle roll over and play dead, but instead explore how Saddam and DUH-Be-Ya mesmerized the world with their divergent leadership styles.
And so I perform a free computerized astrological compatibility check on the putative American president and his nemesis du jour to determine how star-crossed they really are, and what makes their alleged enmity so … special.
I use this data – Saddam Hussein, born April 28, 1937, Tikrit, Iraq; George W Bush, born July 6, 1946, New Haven, CT – and receive the following often inadvertently hilarious information about their “unique relationship.” What does it mean? You tell me. I am not making this up.
Saddam’s Sun Square, GWB’s Mercury
The two of you do not always see eye-to-eye on issues, and it’s very easy for George W. Bush to become critical of Saddam Hussein. Compounding the problem is Saddam’s tendency to be very sensitive to criticism from GWB and consequently react defensively to this criticism. This need not be a serious problem however; a little tolerance for each other’s right to disagree and respect for individual differences is all it takes to make personal differences interesting rather than annoying.
Saddam’s Sun Square, GWB’s Pluto
Your relationship is intense and complex. You engage in deep, intense discussions and encounters that unveil your innermost thoughts, feelings, goals, hopes, fears, and ambitions. This is not a superficial relationship! You are very uninhibited with each other, and you open up to each other more readily than to others. Be wary of power struggles, however, as GWB, in particular, may be tempted to manipulate and control Saddam. Also, either of you may feel threatened, embarrassed or disempowered by revealing so much of yourself to the other, and consequently feel the need to be secretive and competitive with each other. You have a profound influence upon one another, for good or ill.
Saddam’s Sun Trine, GWB’s Mars
Successful cooperation in achieving goals and accomplishing tasks is highlighted. You make an excellent working team and you are able to assist each other in achieving specific, concrete goals.
How GWB relates to other people
- You’re not awfully good at being disagreed with. You delve into matters, think them through thoroughly and expect your conclusions to be universally shared. Flexibility is not your strong suit. No one should try to lie to you or keep things from you. Somehow you ferret out others’ secrets although you keep your own.
- Sometimes you suffer from an excess of enthusiasm and plunge into relationships and projects without seriously considering beforehand the viability of the situation. You are kind, honest and good-humored. Sometimes you’re also a show-off or a know-it-all.
- Love for you is often a “divine discontent.” You are so romantic and idealistic it is difficult for any mortal person to sustain your interest without disappointing you. Your need to idealize loved ones may make you susceptible to illusion.
- You know things intuitively as well as rationally and have a rare capacity to perceive in others feelings, thoughts and dreams they may never have openly shared. Anyone close to you would have to share your … interest in spiritual thought.
- Yours was an indulged childhood with lots of love and lots of cookies. You have a generous nature both emotionally and materially and people are usually pleased to provide you with the love and creature-comforts you both require and cheerfully give.
How Saddam relates to other people
- You are restless and independent and, no matter how close you become to someone, you always remain your own person and there is a part of yourself you cannot share. You are uncompromisingly true to your convictions which must be shared by those close to you.
- You may be overly self-indulgent and inclined toward excesses of eating, drinking, sex or anything which gives you pleasure. You would not be comfortable with someone who was too reserved. You can be quite extravagant both emotionally and financially.
- You are extremely persuasive and, perhaps, skilled at manipulating others to share your views. Your intuition is powerful and the research skills which may help you professionally also manifest in your private life. You know everyone’s deepest secrets.
There you have it, folks. Believe it or else.
