A Labored Day: No picnic

Aren't you rilly-rilly-rilly pleased the putative president saluted workers on Labor Day? Isn't that just speshul?

Stick that in your tank along with skyrocketing gas prices.

TRENDING: Is America having a near-death experience, or is this the end?

This guy runs his country like a losing sports team. I mean, raising ticket prices, doing away with the cheap seats in the bleachers, cheating in the playoffs, benching the decent players, tearing up the rules, trading the workhorses, destroying the stadium, sabotaging the competition, blowing the budget on superboxes for the rich, phony PR, secret strategies, pointless uniforms with bigger numbers and widgets so useless they just litter the playing field, while diverting the crowd with insidiously spectacular fireworks that strike them deaf, dumb and blind.

Actually, he spells "run" as "r-u-i-n."

Although – depending on if you really believe two years ago the United States' recession was declared officially over or not – more than 9 million Americans are currently unemployed, nearly a million more than last year. This is not merely a "slow recovery," guys. Can you spell "Great Depression"?

Kinda Orwellian parallels with the war we "won" in Iraq, doesn't it, where more U.S. soldiers are getting picked off during the "peace."

Meanwhile, according to a recent Associated Press report, "Labor leaders ... point to the nation's 6.2 percent unemployment rate in July and the 2.7 million net jobs lost in the economy since the recession began in March 2001. They also argue that Bush's three rounds of tax cuts passed by Congress have gone to the wealthiest taxpayers and sent the deficit soaring."

Yes – besides those burgeoning overseas sweatshops so popular with America's major corporations, gutting our manufacturing industry – we haven't even begin to reel from the staggering effects of international outsourcing of U.S. tech-support jobs globally, eventually challenging the USA's world technology dominance.

This is a math-challenged administration, for sure. Has Bush43 ever balanced a checkbook in his entire life, or is Laura the numbers nitpicker in the family? I'd suggest "Bellows," my accountant, for implementing some remedial national fiscal reconfiguration, and explaining the dangers of defunding the federal government, but at the moment he's packing up his old kit bag and moving to New Joisey digs with his lady love.

Even a ticked-off eighth-term congressman from Ohio has noticed DUH-Be-Ya's "turned the $5.6 trillion surplus he inherited from his Democratic predecessor into an estimated debt of $3.3 trillion – a terrible burden we will now have to pass on to our children."

Those lying, thieving Republicans – I think the actual figure's much higher, closer to $5 trillion, even more alarming and paralytic.

This presidency has picked your pocket and mine in the past, present and future. If these recent, horrific money trends continue, I predict, soon banks will charge us to open interest-bearing accounts – making us pay them, like telephone calling plans.

Finally, the Numbo-crats – shudder – are freaked. As Rep. Sherrod Brown, D-Ohio, pointed out in his party's official response to the presidential recent radio pap, I mean, message, "Our 401(k)s have collapsed. Our senior citizens have seen interest rates on their savings drop below 1 percent. We worry about threats to retirees' health care and pensions."

Naturally there's more.

For Pete's sake, Bush-Wah can't even hold a darn dog right. I'm not talking about openly hostile Lyndon Johnson twirling a bipartisan beagle by its ears, or passive-aggressive Richard Nixon wishing he could kick his cocker spaniel Checkers to kingdom come, or the feckless Clinton renovators running over poor Buddy (RIP) with their truck.

I mean, here's that poor presidential pup Barney, in the words of the ever-vigilant Associated Press, "accidentally fell onto the tarmac when Mrs. Bush was handing him to her husband. The dog apparently was unharmed, but the fall startled ... the president, who quickly scooped Barney back in his arms."

There's a metaphor if I've ever seen one. As "Meg" the activist says, "We are so stupid, we are so stupid, we are so stupid."

Wake up, America! I repeat: This guy can't even hold up his own dog right.