Ono, she's stripping again!

Seventy-year-old Yoko Ono, wife of late Beatle John Lennon, and "singer" whose shriek is the mating call of the Tinnitus Warbler, recently finished performing what she calls a "cut piece," in which audience members come onstage and clip off pieces of her clothing until she's nearly naked. Does all of this accomplish or prove anything, other than Newton's Law?

Supposedly, this all somehow promotes world peace. Ono performed her first "cut piece" in 1964, and almost 40 years later, amidst all the world turmoil, did it again. I'm starting to think that maybe it's not working.

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It went over big with some of those in attendance, however. One 18-year-old spectator who watched Ono's clothes being cut off said, "Scissors usually have a violent connotation, but she turns it around to make it peaceful."

I don't really want to know what this girl's childhood was like, if she associates scissors with violence. God only knows what she thinks of corn holders, clothes irons and staplers. Perhaps Ono's next pro-peace event should be held in this kid's living room.

Ono has taken other steps to help save us from ourselves. Early last year, she rented a billboard in London, which read: "Imagine all people living life in peace." Now that cashiers at Piccadilly Square gift shops and bellboys at The Conrad have read the message on a daily basis, hopefully, the world is that much closer to eliminating the threat of nuclear holocaust.

But why put these billboards in London, New York, Tokyo, etc.? Why not put them where they really belong – in Afghanistan, Somalia, Liberia, Iran, North Korea and in the backyards of drug cartels? That's an easy question to answer: Because she'd get killed, thrown in jail for life or, worse, sentenced to listen to one of her own albums.

Frivolous and appetite-suppressing theatrics like "cut piece" and pro-peace billboards posted in the wrong country, in a way, are an attempt to assign a portion of the blame to the innocent.

The approach is straight from the '60s hippie playbook: "Blame reassignment end-around, on two. Ready, break!" It's less dangerous than approaching the guilty, and you can still delude yourself into thinking you did something.

We must remember though, Ono comes from a mindset that actually believes true global change can be brought about by lying around in bed for a weekend. If she ever performs another "bed in," tens of thousands of teen-agers will be thrilled to learn that they're playing a major role in the peace movement, and all while never being distracted from Playstation II.

We all participate in symbolism from time to time, however. A day after the Sept. 11 terrorist attacks, 200 members of Congress – some Democrat, some Republican, most overweight – stood on the Capitol steps and sang "God Bless America" in a dramatic show of unity. The event was intended to send a message to terrorists that Americans stand together in times of crisis. But was anything compromised as a result (besides atheism and the structural integrity of the Capitol steps)? We were.

That little bit of symbolism gave us the false impression that, from that day forward, things would be different and Congress would now work together to defeat a common enemy. More than two years after that day, there is a bitter divide over the war on terrorism, and congressional resistance to it – including a Chivas-glazed spiral-sliced-ham-in-a-suit named Ted Kennedy calling the war in Iraq a "fraud." He may have thought that for a long time, but as is tradition with him, he's just now bothering to report it.

Since Yoko's husband John released the pacifist anthems "Imagine" and "Give Peace A Chance," the couple's "bed in" and Ono's first "cut piece," we had a continuation of hostilities in Vietnam, the tragedy at the Olympic games in Munich, the hostage crisis in Iran, embassy bombings, hijackings, continuous violence in the Middle East and constant terrorist attacks around the world. Why isn't it working? The answer is simple: Terrorists, criminals, warmongers and despots clearly don't listen to FM radio, read back issues of "Rolling Stone" and attend Paris theater nearly enough.

One must be careful though in trying to convince Yoko that her superficial and poorly targeted attempts at peace aren't making a real difference. She may start agreeing, and the next thing you know you'll be strolling through Central Park and see her latest piece of art – a statue dedicated to the futility of symbolism.