My lesbian friend and
same-sex marriage

By Kelly Hollowell

About two weeks ago, I had a visit from my best friend from high school. Although she was raised a Catholic, attended Catholic school and was committed to the Catholic tradition and faith well into college, she now lives an openly gay lifestyle. When she chose to live an actively gay lifestyle she was in her 20s. Her choice came at high cost. She was rejected by her family for years.

When time in our visit arrived for serious discussion, my question to her was “How did you arrive at the decision to embrace the gay lifestyle rejecting the traditions of your faith and biblical principles?”

Her answer was simple – she does not believe the scripture is the inerrant word of God. Worse, at the most critical time of questioning, she sought out a priest who told her “that nothing done in love could be a sin,” thereby condoning the gay lifestyle. She further assured me that she maintains her faith, attends church regularly and has a personal relationship with God.

My first response to her was that Scripture is God-breathed and inerrant. Its authenticity is proven by thousands of archeological finds that include verification of customs, places, names and events. Additionally, the Dead Sea scrolls discovered at Qumran in 1947 and more than 24,000 partial and complete manuscript copies of the New Testament attest to accurate transcription of the Bible text. Finally, divine inspiration is revealed by recently discovered scientific principles that are riddled in the earliest Scripture as well as hundreds of Bible prophecies that have come true in exact detail.

That means her disbelief is a choice. It is not based on fact, and the priest’s advice is bunk. According to Scripture, homosexuality is wrong and the heart is deceitful above all else. It further means that she doesn’t have a “personal relationship” with the God of the Bible. She has a personal god – that is one of her own making and understanding.

I then asked if she thought homosexuals should be married. Her answer was yes. She cited the difficulty of having her partner present in critical situations as well as issues of inheritance, insurance and various other benefits. Of course, as an attorney, I answered that most benefits can be directed to anyone we choose, although additional legal hurdles may be necessary to direct and attain them.

So there we were, two mutually respectful friends of many years at loggerheads. Each thinking the other had their brain and values twisted in a vice. Neither of us was able to break through the line of defenses and thinking of the other. Our exchange, in many ways, was a microcosm of events on Capital Hill, specifically, the debate over gay marriage that took place on the Senate floor, with at least one obvious distinction.

We were civil to one another without compromising our positions. We didn’t attack each other personally or call each other names. And when our talk was over, we ate lunch and had a few laughs before saying goodbye. How often, I wonder, does that happen on Capitol Hill? More importantly, shouldn’t those espousing the Christian stand strive to set and maintain a tone of civility and respect on this and other hot-button issues?

Regarding the Federal Marriage Amendment debated this week in Washington, no one expected it to pass. Still, proponents are not discouraged. They urge that the proposal was a political tactic to make public the position of each senator, to identify the battleground states and to urge voters to “remember in November,” thus ensuring the FMA an emotionally-charged role during campaigns this fall.

Apart from the fray of politics, there is at least one more argument against gay marriage I intend to share with my friend. It moves beyond the focus on rights, the Constitution, tradition and family. It actually moves beyond the focus of man on man and will only speak to those who have some understanding of The Holiness and majesty of God – the God of the Bible. It is taken from the March newsletter of Pastor David Wilkerson of World Challenge and Times Square Church in New York.

In it he wrote, “Christ likened the female, the wife as a type of his church – his bride.” By analogy, Christ is therefore likened to the male. So, the God-ordained union of a man and woman as husband and wife is, among other things, symbolic of the Holiest matrimony of Christ to His bride the church. Therefore, “gay marriage is a lawless mockery of true God-ordained marriage” and unacceptable to God and those who are called by His name.