Krazy John Kerry

By Vox Day

I believe George Bush is a traitor to the American people and their Constitution. I believe he should be impeached for sacrificing American sovereignty to supra-national organizations and I suspect that he would be perfectly content to establish a neo-fascist corporatist state in which the government was allowed to trample individual liberties.

Now, have I sufficiently established my anti-Bush bona fides to write about John Kerry without being accused of being a Republican lapdog?

Bush is, without question, an execrable president. But that does not make John Kerry fit for the office. Nothing that Bush has done, or will do, has anything whatsoever to do with John Kerry’s truthfulness, his character or his mental stability. Humans are not a zero-sum game.

And the truth is that John Kerry is a very, very strange individual. Bill Clinton was once described as an unusually good liar – Krazy John Kerry is proving to be an unusually weird one.

Although the mainstream media and the ABCNNBCBS cabal have done their very best to sweep the stunning revelations of Krazy John’s former comrades-in-arms – the swiftboat veterans – under the carpet, enough word has leaked out from the blogosphere to wreak what would appear to be fatal damage to the Kerry campaign.

Even Kerry’s most diehard defenders have already conceded he was not in Cambodia over Christmas 1968, regardless of what Krazy John has claimed was seared – seared – into his memory. We’re still waiting to discover the owner of the hat which Krazy John says was given to him on one of his secret missions – missions so secret that his crew, his fellow commanders and his commanding officer all deny they ever happened.

Now Kerry’s defenders are getting a little crazy themselves. The Washington Post ignored the exposure of Kerry’s Cambodian lies in favor of reporting that the military records of Larry Thurlow, a swiftboat commander and one of the authors of “Unfit for Command,” contradict Thurlow’s own recollection of events. Apparently, we are supposed to see this as some sort of self-contradiction. However, the only thing it actually contradicts is Krazy John’s version. For, as Thurlow explains:

I submitted no paperwork for a medal nor did I file an after action report describing the incident. To my knowledge, John Kerry was the only officer who filed a report describing his version of the incidents that occurred on the river that day.

It’s too bad the Hero of the Mekong Delta didn’t bother turning on his ever-present camera on the river that day – surely that would settle the issue. Written, directed and starring … John Kerry!

Nor is the Washington Post the only media outlet determined to go down with the swiftboat. Two of Slate’s biggest dogs criticized the vets’ ad, saying:

Several Swiftvets then appear on the screen, saying they “served with” Kerry. This is a semantic trick. Edwards is talking about crewmates who, at one time or another, accompanied Kerry on his six-man boat. The Swiftvets served with Kerry only in the sense that they manned other boats in Vietnam.

Well, except for Steve Gardner, who served in Vietnam six times longer than Krazy John, and had this to say about his former commanding officer:

How can Kerry possibly be commander in chief when he couldn’t competently command a six-man crew? Kerry was erratic. He hardly ever did what he was supposed to do. His command decisions put us in more peril then he should have. But mostly he just ran. When John Kerry looked out the bow of the boat and he saw tracer fire coming after him, he’d turn and run.

Kerry’s propensity to turn and run is the one thing that Kerry and his critics agree upon. And Gardner’s contention that Kerry “hardly ever did what he was supposed to do” is supported by Kerry’s own description of his Silver Star-winning heroics, where he violated several swiftboat procedures and put his entire crew in danger in order to personally kill a wounded enemy, as if the boat’s three .50 caliber machine guns would not have sufficed.

The strangest thing about Krazy John is not his overly vivid imagination, his propensity for self-serving fiction, or his creepy public persona. No, the most incomprehensible thing about John Kerry is the fact that anyone, Republican or Democrat, believes a single word that comes out of his mouth.