When is it OK to file bankruptcy?

Can't a wife get a second job?

Dear Dave,

TRENDING: Is America having a near-death experience, or is this the end?

I listen to you often and enjoy your radio show, but why don't you ever ask women to go to work? When a family is broke and the woman is at home raising one child who is already in the fifth grade, it seems fair to ask the wife to get a "second job."

George

Dear George,

I think far too many ladies in America, in the name of paying for stuff they don't need, have left the household and the children for the workplace. Many of them didn't even want to do this – they just felt obligated to do it by people like you. There are a lot of ladies who have sacrificed their ability to be full-time moms on the altar of the car payment.

Sometimes ladies have to go to work. There's a time and a place for that kind of thing. But if there's a way I can financially and budget-wise figure out how mom can be at home baking cookies when that fifth grader walks in the house, and if that's what she wants to do, then you're going to find me fighting for her opportunity to do that. There's no higher calling on the planet than motherhood. We've lost that in this culture, and we're suffering dearly for it.

I'm no Neanderthal jerk. I don't say every mother has to be at home or they're a bad person. But we've got very few people anymore who defend full-time, in-the-home motherhood. The inference you're making is that she's lazy. Tell you what, you go take over her job for a week, dude. There's not a lazy bone in her body!

Dave

When is it OK to file bankruptcy?

Dear Dave,

I'm sitting down with my sister this weekend to analyze her financial situation, and I suspect it's not very good. At what point should you file bankruptcy?

Jamie in Mississippi

Dear Jamie,

Almost never. Ninety-something percent of bankruptcies that are filed don't have to be filed. I tell people to file bankruptcy about as often as I tell them to file for divorce – I don't. There are always situations where good people get into bad things, but I think a lot of divorces are the result of people just giving up and I think most bankruptcies are, too.

Even if you don't have any numbers yet, what you do have is a sister who is obviously overwhelmed and asking for help. When you sit down with her, get her to draw back from the situation and not be emotional. Tell her to sell the car, take an extra job, live on a budget and have a garage sale. Make sure she takes care of necessities like food, shelter, clothing, transportation and utilities. She may take a few dings on her credit along the way, but you can still map out a plan where she's not only caught up but completely debt-free in about two years.

She's probably not bankrupt, but she is out of control and has lost hope. It may take a little while to clean up this mess, but you should never file bankruptcy on something you can clean up in two years. Never! Walk her through it, Jamie. Most of all she needs a plan and the hope that goes with having one in place.

Dave