A bear market in New Jersey

Question: Why is New Jersey called "The Garden State"?

Answer: Because "The Oil and Petrochemical Refining State" is too long to fit on license plates.

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That's the old joke from the Sandra Bullock movie "Miss Congeniality." I don't just throw it out there today as a refugee of New Jersey who finds himself back in his home state for a few days.

This is, indeed, a whacked-out, schizophrenic place to live, work and visit.

You would never know it from the caricatures of the heavily industrialized, populated and developed state, but most of New Jersey, like the other 49 states, remains undeveloped wilderness.

Fans of the "X-Files" will be familiar with the tales of the "Jersey Devil," either an undiscovered species or a relative of Bigfoot or some supernatural beast inhabiting the legendary Pine Barrens.

But another more familiar kind of terrestrial beast is causing concern in suburban communities throughout much of Northern New Jersey. Black bears are terrorizing homeowners and campers.

Having lived in California and other states plagued by such seasonal problems, I can tell you how easy it is to solve. You allow people to hunt the bears. End of problem.

But New Jersey Gov. Jon Corzine and his Department of Environmental Protection are resisting such a sensible prescription. They canceled last year's bear hunt, saying they preferred non-lethal means of bear control.

A judge is eagerly awaiting a report from DEP Commissioner Lisa Jackson on how she plans to coax and cajole the black bears to keep to their own kind.

I'm eager to hear about the plan, too. The prospects are interesting to ponder:

• Will N.J. officials provide the bears with birth control devices?
• Will they file restraining orders against the critters?
• Will the plan include amnesty for past bear offenses?
• Will they take the poisoned pet food from China and begin putting it in homeowners' garbage cans?
• Will they outlaw tourists and their picnic baskets?

I think I know how to get some action for bear-weary New Jerseyites. Just introduce Ms. Jackson and Gov. Corzine to some of their black bear friends. I trust that if Yogi and Boo-Boo came to visit them at night, it might give state officials a whole new appreciation of bear hunting.

The policy Jackson and Corzine seem intent on following, whether they explain it or not, is one familiar to radical environmentalists around the world. It is the policy of "re-wilding" – allowing nature to reclaim populated areas, putting man back on the defensive against predator beasts.

It's really a strategy for depopulation. People are supposed to live only in cities and planned communities under such policies. Imagine instituting such a plan in densely populated New Jersey.

I don't know if this perverted ideology is what drives Jackson and Corzine or whether it is simply an anti-hunting ethos to go along with the state's anti-gun ethos.

Whatever it is, you can see how misguided their resulting policies are. They would jeopardize the lives and welfare of taxpaying citizens of New Jersey before they would harm a hair on the behind of one innocent black bear.

While I find myself back in New Jersey today marveling over this controversy, I also recognize I am in it but not of it. It's like returning to your place of birth only to discover it has become something of a foreign country to me.

There are always those who will say hunting is cruel, hunting is mean, hunting is barbaric. That's fine. If you feel that way, don't hunt. But hunting is a proven, tried-and-true means of animal control. It works wherever and whenever it is permitted. And there are plenty of people who enjoy doing it, even paying for the privilege.

It's a surefire way to avoid the grisly encounters that can otherwise occur between man and beast.

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