I was listening to a local talk-radio program the other day. The topic centered on the challenges young mothers face in today's world.
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The issue that sparked the debate was the recent death of a local 5-month-old baby.
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A young and inexperienced mother had forgotten to drop her newborn off at day care. Instead, she drove directly to work, parked her sports utility vehicle in the parking lot and left her baby in the back seat.
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We were in the middle of a heat wave, and over the course of six hours or so, the newborn was literally baked to death.
Needless to say, when the mother returned later that afternoon she opened her car door to the worst day of her life.
The sudden shock.
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The bone-chilling horror.
The sheer grief.
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She stood gazing upon the parched form of her baby, tortured by the thought that she was the cause of her infant's death.
Whatever one might think of her utter incompetence as a mom, no one, and I mean no one, with any sense of compassion can feel anything but sympathy for her.
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But this column really isn't about her.
It's about us and our attitude toward motherhood and children.
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The local talk-show host used the tragedy to discuss ways in which the "state should get involved" to help inexperienced mothers. Calls came in by the dozens demanding, "No woman should ever have to go through this again. Ever!" And of course, there was the obligatory, "It takes a village."
The stupidity of some people sometimes is beyond the pale. I mean really. What government program is going to solve a memory lapse?
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Besides the pandering for greater state intervention, the other troubling notion wasn't that the mother forgot to take her baby to day care – any committed career woman is going to be preoccupied with thoughts about the day's work and forget little packages in the back seat that aren't making a fuss. It was the fact that so many woman called into the show demanding immediate state intervention to "ensure that this never happens again," and never once raising a question about why a young mother "chose her career" over her baby.
Are these women out of touch with reality, or what?
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Now, I can't say for sure, but it appears that the young mother had checked out of being a committed full-time mom long before this tragedy ever occurred. But like I said, I don't know. Perhaps she's a single mom, trying to make ends meet. Maybe.
But the very idea of leaving one's newborn with a stranger … I mean, doesn't something like maternal instinct kick in?
Culturally, the culpability in this case is much worse than this young gal's memory lapse. As a culture, we've done much worse than simply forgetting what motherhood means. We've willfully abandoned the concept.
The ideal – which rarely gets mentioned these days – is that in the best interest of the child, a mother shouldn't be preoccupied with work and finances; she should be preoccupied with her newborn.
Instead, we've embraced the lies out-of-touch feminists tell – the notion that women can have it both ways. They can have a career and a baby, and do both with equal competence.
And then there is the pressure society places on these young gals, which leads them to feel "kept" by a man if they decide they'd much rather stay home. And what about the governments, with the high taxes and a lack of respect for the basic institution of the family, what culpability lies with them? They have all but forced both parents into the workforce just so they can afford the basics of "the good life."
And then there is our degrading of children. We've cheapened their value. In the worst case, children have become a "burden to be avoided at all costs." And in the best of the worst-case scenarios, children are simply an add-on commodity. As long as they fit into our lifestyle and our career, they're a nice thing to have around. They make us feel "complete." Provided, of course, we have others to look after them.
It is this kind of cultural attitude that fuels our maniacal treatment of children, evidenced in everything from abortion on demand to the ineptitude of a career woman – or man for that matter – whose priorities have become so twisted that they can absentmindedly forget a child in the back seat of a car.
But when you really think about it, this bizarre phenomenon that is occurring with too much frequency – the trend toward forgetting little children, either in cars or in life – isn't that hard to understand. Because when motherhood is poorly regarded, children have no greater value than the commodities that adorn our cars. Should we really be surprised when someone forgets them in the back seat for the day?
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