From stalwarts to stall-warts, they all must go

Is it time to finally put term limits into place for Congress, or do we need something more drastic?

Things have gotten way out of control. Congress has become one giant restroom, and everybody's tapping their shoes in code – tapping for bribes, sex, socialism, illegal campaign donations, open borders, drugs and just plain idiotic ideas. Recent examples are too numerous to list.

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Idaho Sen. Larry Craig doing a Bill "Bojangles" Robinson tap routine in an airport bathroom stall brought the issue of congressional hijinx into focus for yet another week, but Craig is just the wingtip of the iceberg. Craig doesn't supply an argument for term limits, as he limited his own term with his resignation. With most other politicians, we're not so lucky.

Social perversions and personal legal and ethical problems pale in comparison to the real reason Congress needs a full overhaul. We need look no further than the fact that securing our borders is actually a debatable issue for evidence of how far we've allowed ourselves to fall. However, personal shortcomings and professional mishandling can go hand-in-hand. Incredibly poor judgment tends to transcend private and professional boundaries.

What in the world has happened to the grand vision of the Founders? Being in Congress was designed to be a fairly noble and temporary venture, but it's turned into a lucrative life-long career option where pockets are lined, money is stolen, bathrooms are cruised and surrender is an option. Ted Kennedy even proved that you can kill a voter and still be elected over and over again – such is the luxury of having such a wide margin of support that one in the drink makes no difference either way as long as you're bringing home the bacon.

Do you ever grow weary of politicians describing what they and their colleagues do for a living as "public service," as if they've devoted their lives to personal financial and social sacrifice in order to make our lives better? Please! Prostitutes service the public too, and that's illegal in most areas. What's the difference?

The detective who arrested Larry Craig certainly seems to know about Congress. Here's a quick give and take from the arrest transcript:

Detective: OK, sir. We deal with people that lie to us everyday.

Sen. Craig: I'm sure you do.

Detective: I'm sure you do too sir.

Somebody give that man a cigar (no, not you Mr. Clinton). I wouldn't have expected a man whose job it is to sit on the toilet – skillfully utilizing every ounce of training to overcome obstacles such as poor lighting, thin paper and numb cheeks while waiting for men to hit on him – to be a clear voice of reason. Compared to Congress however, everybody sounds sane.

Why not put term limits into place for Congress? After all, we have term limits on the presidency. First of all, I don't really believe that term limits will solve the problem, certainly not for localized elections. I can see no positive "proof of performance" that term limits are effective.

Take a look at California. The Golden State has had term limits for its state legislature for around a decade, and their politicians and laws are getting nuttier by the day – so nutty, in fact, that all bills that pass are co-sponsored by Planters.

Installing term limits simply means that a politician has an enormous amount of idiocy to cram into a much shorter period of time.

Additionally, if voters in a district are content to elect the same pro-tax, anti-Constitution, and, in many cases, crooked politician for decades on end, what would lead us to believe that forcing them to elect a different pro-tax, anti-Constitution and crooked politician every 12 years or so will solve anything?

It certainly would be a good idea to know each politician will be sent to the private sector to live amongst the laws they pass, as career politicians who never return to the private sector are like jet mechanics who are never made to ride on the airplanes they've been working on. But this won't solve a thing if their replacements are just as bad, and this responsibility lies with the voters.

What can be done to take a Congress that's gone full-blown crazy and restore it to its original intended state of relative insanity? I'm open to ideas, but it's dangerously close to being a lost cause. A nation where the politicians cannibalize citizens, and vice versa, can't last for too long.

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