Editor’s note: Michael Ackley’s columns may include satire and parody based on current events, and thus mix fact with fiction. He assumes informed readers will be able to tell which is which.
Human Rights Watch wants President Barack Obama to turn a few inmates of the Guantanamo Bay “detention camp” loose in the United States – as an example to other nations, you know.
Let us suggest instead that he release former Border Patrol agents Ignacio Ramos and Jose Compean now, instead of forcing them to spend another two months in prison. It’s an idea that would be embraced by most Americans, who understand that though the two were convicted of shooting a fleeing suspect, they are highly unlikely to threaten national security or their fellow citizens.
WND readers don’t need to be reminded (but we shall do so anyway) that the two weren’t firing at an “illegal immigrant,” as one national news outlet had it. They shot a drug smuggler.
The new president wants Congress to hurry an economic stimulus bill to his desk – before people realize the economy is improving without one. By the way, the acronym for the Troubled Asset Relief Program – TARP – seems most unfortunate. Aren’t tarps used to cover up things? … Now take Hilda Solis – please! The new secretary of labor said of her nomination, “I am humbled and honored. I will work to strengthen our unions.” Solis, as a congresswoman, has demonstrated scant commitment to the democratic process. She sponsored the bill that would eliminate secret-ballot elections in the formation of bargaining units. Perhaps somebody should point out it is not the job of the federal government to strengthen labor unions, any more than it is the job of the feds to take the side of business.
Speaking of organized labor: California’s public employee unions are irate that Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger wants to “furlough” state workers two days a month to save money. Besides contractual arguments, there has been some agonizing over the damage to vital state programs.
Not to worry, folks. Let us illustrate with a true story. A university student of our acquaintance once got a summer job with a state agency. This involved a “vital” project, which absolutely had to be finished by an end-of-summer “deadline.” When other state agencies failed to provide data in time, the conscientious student produced a detailed memorandum listing tasks that should be done to finish the project. When the next college break came around, the student again accepted temporary employment with the agency, and there was the memorandum, gathering dust. The “vital” work was untouched.
Two days off a month? State worker productivity would be as high as ever. If the governor and Legislature really want to save some money, let the leaders get together and draw up proscription lists. These would not be fatal, like those of the ancient Romans, but would entail the firing of the do-nothings occupying hundreds of political patronage jobs.
Our own little media watch: The Los Angeles Times article on anti-Israel demonstrations in the City of Angels referred to Hamas as “the militant Palestinian group.” Ladies and gentlemen of the press: Street demonstrators in the United States are “militant.” Hamas is a murderous terrorist group.
Colorado continues its drive to supplant California as the nation’s center of idiocy. University of Colorado College Democrats oppose appointment of a “professor of conservative thought” because “by endowing a chair in one specific political ideology, we are not promoting intellectual diversity; we are tokenizing a point of view that should be presented in all classes on political thought.” You know, as Ward Churchill used to do.
But of course, the Democratic Party children of the Centennial State well know the conservative point of view is not presented in all classes on political thought. More likely, it isn’t represented in any.
Finally, House Speaker Nancy Pelosi told the San Francisco Chronicle that with George W. Bush’s exit, “It felt like a 10-pound anvil was lifted off my head,” which demands the question: How large an anvil can one balance on the head of a pin?
Democrats’ seething hatred for America
Wayne Allyn Root