Regarding Obama & other turkeys

By Burt Prelutsky

Shortly before Thanksgiving, Obama, having heard that there were still a few extra bucks lying around waiting for him to vacuum up, jetted out here to California. While standing next to Dream Works studio boss/Obama handmaiden Jeffrey Katzenberg, Obama gazed out at the studio employees and, proving that his magical powers are more than a rumor dreamed up by Jay Carney, said: “I can see by looking at you that some of you weren’t born here.”

Assuming that by “here,” he meant the United States, and not the studio, just exactly how did he come by that conclusion? And if he has that capability, isn’t it just possible that when other people look at him and decide he wasn’t born in Hawaii, they might be right?

He followed up that performance by suggesting that we should all sit around the Thanksgiving table and talk up the glory of the Affordable Care Act. What’s more, he was serious. I confess that our little group is occasionally at a loss for conversational fodder once we’re past the mashed potatoes, but I can’t imagine that things would ever run so dry that anyone is likely to say, “How about that Obamacare! Is it great or is it great? Pass the stuffing, please.”

When Obama went back to the White House and granted the Thanksgiving turkey an executive pardon, it wasn’t, as some people assumed, a matter of tradition; it was professional courtesy.

Speaking of Thanksgiving, isn’t it time we at least considered changing its date from the fourth Thursday in November to, say, the fourth Thursday in May? After all, it’s an arbitrary date, unlike Christmas, which at least conservatives will agree celebrates a birth, and isn’t really a tribute to the pagan god of winter and lousy weather, as atheists and other assorted pinheads seem to believe.

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Why should we be giving thanks at a time of year when Christmas, Hanukkah, New Year’s and my birthday all converge – especially when there’s barely time to get home from one family reunion before it’s time to pack up for another? Besides, I think more people are thankful in May than they are in November – and one of the things they’re most thankful for is good weather, which makes travel easier because there are no snowstorms turning airports into barracks.

In Canada, Thanksgiving is celebrated on the second Monday in October. OK, that’s Canada, a place where ice hockey is a national sport. But even here, it has only been a national holiday since the end of Reconstruction in the mid 1870s.

In 1939, FDR, caving to retailers who feared that because the fourth Thursday didn’t fall until very late in the month, Christmas sales would suffer, decided to move it up a week. That year, there were actually two Thanksgiving Days, with his critics mockingly referring to the early one as Franksgiving Day. In 1940, 16 states decided to ignore FDR’s wishes and celebrated the occasion on the traditional date. The push-back was so great that in 1941, Congress capitulated and passed a law ensuring that the fourth Thursday would be the one and only Thanksgiving.

But, if they could change it once, they can do it again. I’m only suggesting they not change it by a piddling week, but by six months.

One of the things I was thankful for this year was that even Al Sharpton – yes, that Al Sharpton! – acknowledged that the Knockout Game, the vile competition in which black teenagers sucker punch white people – apparently garnering additional points if their victims are elderly or Jewish – isn’t a myth concocted by white conservatives in order to portray young blacks as human scum, but is a disgusting reality.

Inasmuch as Sharpton even went so far as to refer to them as thugs, you might think that white liberals in the media would finally find within themselves the courage to acknowledge that when you’ve had generations of black kids being raised without fathers, widespread black hooliganism isn’t an anomaly or a giant lie perpetrated by white racists, but is the inevitable result of a 70 percent rate of illegitimacy. How on earth can that not translate to a lack of discipline, which, in turn, guarantees a vicious cycle of crime, drugs and violence?

If Rev. Al can finally be honest about the fact that young black villains are not the result of white hostility, but of black irresponsibility, and that they are the victimizers far more often than they’re the victims, you would think that Barack Obama, the members of the Congressional Black Caucus and the liberal media might follow suit.

I realize that I am only dreaming, but this is, after all, the season of miracles.

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