Single moms raising more violent men

"I will slaughter every single blonde slut I see …" – Elliot Rodger

When I heard about the tragic killing of six people in Isla Vista near a student enclave at U.C. Santa Barbara, I knew that the killer was more than likely raised by a single mother and driven by hatred for women.

My 24 years of experience counseling families and individuals, backed by other studies, indicates that most violent male offenders come from single female-headed households.

Elliot Rodger, 22, stabbed three of his roommates to death; he shot two women to death outside a sorority house, and shot and killed another man before killing himself.

There are a few glaring similarities between Elliot Rodger and other violent male offenders: 1) Single mothers raised them, 2) They are withdrawn and angry and 3) They are medicated.

Elliot was a good-looking guy, he drove a BMW, and he lived in beautiful Santa Barbara, and yet he was an extremely angry male. Why?

There have been a number of similar killings in America over the past decade. In order to help prevent future bloodshed, we have to look at the commonalities that link these cases.

Elliot's parents were divorced, and his mother raised him. She spoiled him by giving him a BMW 3-Series coupe and other material things. But what he needed most was the love of his father. Dads offer the spiritual love that instills confidence in children.

A close family friend revealed that Elliot's parents worried daily that their son would take his own life. The friend described Elliot as an extremely "lonely" and "very removed and remote child."

He moved out of his mother's home in Calabasas in June of 2011 to Santa Barbara because, "I was desperate to have the life I know I deserve; a life of being wanted by attractive girls, a life of sex and love."

His mother saw the final video in which her son said he was going to exact "retribution" and "slaughter" the girls who had rejected him.

I'm sure his mother did the best she could, but giving her disturbed son a BMW was not going to repair his broken spirit. Males raised and nurtured on mama's "love" resent the need that they have for women.

We need to be honest – Elliot's parents failed their son! If they were not selfish people, they would have stayed together so their son would have grown up with both parents. Had they done that, and given Elliot real love, he would not have needed meds or turned to violence.

Fathers provide the spiritual love that is missing in the world today. Mothers – unless they have real love for their husbands – give an emotional love that creates an unhealthy need in boys and makes them subject to women.

According to one of the biggest studies of its kind, researchers in Sweden found that children in one-parent homes are twice as likely as those in two-parent families to develop serious psychiatric problems and addictions later in life.

Studies also show that 80 percent of rapists motivated with displaced anger come from fatherless homes; 85 percent of youths in prisons grew up in fatherless homes (source: Fulton County Georgia jail populations, Texas Department of Corrections, 1992).

Elliot is similar to Adam Lanza, the 20-year-old who massacred 20 children and six adult staff members at Sandy Hook Elementary School. Lanza's parents were divorced. Like Elliot had been during his childhood, Lanza too was on meds. Nancy Lanza did everything she could to "love" her son. She was a volunteer at Sandy Hook Elementary, and Adam Lanza shot his mother in the face four times because he felt that she loved the kids at the school more than him.

The left is trying to use the Elliot Rodger Isla Vista shooting to call for tighter gun restrictions, but blaming the violence on guns does a disservice to the victims. The problem starts at home!

Single female households and violence in black community

The crime and violence in the black community is a prime example of the damaging effect of broken families and single female-headed households. Seventy percent of black children are born out of wedlock, and most live with their mothers, who are ill equipped to handle the challenges of raising boys.

There are thousands of potential black Elliot Rodgers and Adam Lanzas – consumed with anger – in the black community. The reality is, single female households are producing millions of violent male offenders.

Elliot Rodger's murderous rampage is evil, and there is no excusing it. But if we don't acknowledge the truth that this type of violence is primarily a direct result of broken families, the problem – and the body count – will only worsen!

The problem is not a mental issue. It's a spiritual deficit. There are no amounts of meds that will fix it. Only true forgiveness can help a person overcome this unhealthy and sometimes deadly need for "love." Intact, two-parent homes, with a father and a mother, help to prevent it.

Note: Brotherhood Organization of a New Destiny, or BOND, will be hosting its "5^th Annual Conference on Fatherhood and Men" on Saturday, June 14 in Los Angeles. The event is free and open to all men. For information, visit BondInfo.org.