How to get people to do what you want

What was I thinking? Or was I thinking?

Want to know how to get what you want? Our Lord says, "Ask and you shall receive!" This is the straightforward approach; but admit it, this doesn't always work.

Instead, try this: "Deceive, divert, it's guaranteed. You will receive what I subvert!" Watch this and learn:

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In other words, if you want to influence others to your way of thinking, surround yourself with the right people and props. Be subtle in your presentation of ideas. Be persistent in your pitch and you can orchestrate right and wrong – or at least the perception of what answer or product is right and which is (sorry!) wrong. You're not forcing anybody, just exercising your rights and giving others the option of engaging their (ahem) free will.

But be warned: being an arbiter of right and wrong comes with the inevitable ranking and rating at the Pearly Gates. The Good Shepherd doesn't take too kindly to those who willfully mislead His sheep. And while He does forgive, our forefathers may not be so inclined when they rush up to meet us, wanting to know what we did with all the freedom they left us.

How bad things get marketed as good

Woman: the heart of the home. She who sets the tone for family and the very rhythm of life is always a prime advertising target. Having nailed the surging male market for tobacco after World War I – a given, considering smokes were a staple of daily war rations – George Washington Hill of the American Tobacco Company set out in 1928 to snare that more elusive beast: the female customer.

Not that women didn't smoke; but doing so was taboo. Not the best for profits. What to do?

It took some early marketing geniuses to figure it out: use vanity.

Women were encouraged to "reach for a Lucky" (a Lucky Strike cigarette), not a sweet. By tapping into the fear that men didn't already find them attractive, sales soared.

Great! But not good enough.

Big business is nothing but glorified gold digging. And aligning smoking with the triumph of women's suffrage was the ideal pickax. Propagandist – er, I mean public relations expert – Edward Bernays, nephew of Sigmund Freud, determined to sway the country. Women must have the right to smoke that equalizer. They must be free to puff away without shame ... or interference.

But angry, sign-pumping marchers would never do. Bernays needed something sweet and feminine, something family-friendly, and something above reproach to put objection to sleep. In others words, that spoonful of sugar really does make the medicine go down. With the image of women smoking still largely tied to loose morals, the American Tobacco Company needed a city-sized lollipop.

The New York City Easter Parade, a tradition begun in the 1870s, was selected. A cigarette float was not in the plan. Instead, an organized demonstration was. Nothing violent, just a cadre of rich debutantes – American untouchables, decked out in their Sunday best – would light their "torches of freedom" on cue. On behalf of equality for women! Who would gainsay them? Absent fathers? The cop on the beat? The press?

No. Much like today, while society at large was buffaloed, the press promoted the actions of these affluent women as "brave." But while women were sold on selling equality, they were really just buying cigarettes. And buying into lung cancer, early-onset wrinkles, and a host of medical issues previously enjoyed by men.

What's being marketed at today's Easter parades?

Are boys just ... defective girls?

The war on boys is not a recipe for a successful society. Consider this sobering analysis by "the factual feminist" Christina Hoff Sommers, who offers concrete suggestions for working with (not against) the "kinetic imagination" of boys:

I am loath to think of a world absent of real men. So let's take our boys and appreciate them for what they are – future men – before it's too late.

Women should "know their limits" (and act dumb)

Women – know your limits! Or, rather, embrace your value! Watch this hilarious spoof of outspoken women:

Notice how the fear of outmoded thinking is conflated with implied misogyny – not actual hatred of women, just implied – to discount the wisdom of even contemplating the gold standard? Seriously.

The video, however, is a hoot. No, a young woman will not become a harridan – shrew, termagant, virago, harpy, nag, hag, crone, dragon, ogress – by way of college education.

Or will they? Today, "harpy" is the trending hot chick. But combining humor and modern social norms to press or rather repress that which is logical – in this case, the gold standard – no doubt distracted many to believe "Gold Standard – bad" in between guffaws.

What I want to know is, what's so bad about furry kittens?

Teen rebellion – a new phenomonon

Once upon a time, destroying our kids was NOT the goal of society.

Teen girls, 1940s

Yes, really. Remember, "My people are dying from lack of knowledge." Says so right in scripture.

The barrage of social media and prejudiced mixed messaging is making discernment increasingly impossible, especially for the young (who seem convinced that rebelling against logic is some necessary rite of passage). But getting hold of the young is how change agents work their wonders. Divide and conquer?

And yet, growing up wasn't always so difficult. Children learned in the context of family how to be responsible. At the age when kids today are expected to produce little to nothing, kids of yesterday were prepared to take on the responsibility of adulthood. And they did!

But why the change? Why indeed.

Teen girls, 1940s

Despite what you may think you know, "teenager" is a relatively new term. It was coined in the 1940s to define (and exploit) that span of time wherein a mandated increase in education, the ease of mobility, and an uptick in expendable income made it possible for older children to postpone that requisite leap to accountability. And why not? Parents want to give their children everything and to help them out.

Sound familiar? It should. The teenager is the quasi-adult still living off of his or her parent's money, but expecting and increasingly demanding certain freedoms, thanks to the marketing tactics of desire-fueled America. Thank you, Seventeen Magazine! Going strong for 70 years. Target market, girls aged 10-19! Yowza! No wonder we have an entitlement society, increasingly disposed to the idea of taking wealth from those who work and giving it away to those who – quite often – would rather have fun.

What's the saying? The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world ... or, quite possibly, ruins it. Of course, women aren't the only ones manipulated to the detriment of our ailing United States. But the confusion of mixed messages, the very same that has men questioning what is masculine and girls doing little to dispel the quandary, is not helping.