Last week, I conducted an act of domestic terrorism. I ordered non-hybrid garden seeds.
Yes, it’s true. We happen to be concerned about the future of our food sources in this country, and to us the most sensible solution is to grow, raise and harvest our own vegetables, meat, eggs and dairy products. This, according to various Department of Homeland Security reports on right-wing extremism, makes us potential domestic terrorists because we have a “fear and paranoia” of an “impending economic collapse.”
As we get further into this election and the stakes are getting higher and higher, the name-calling, accusations and mud-slinging on both sides of the spectrum are getting worse. Let’s face it, each side thinks the other is wacky. Deplorable. Even irredeemable.
An interesting side effect of the election process is the obligatory airing (or manufacturing) of dirty laundry. This time, however, it’s not just on candidates, but on voters. In fact, it’s become a recurrent theme to accuse ordinary, peaceful, law-abiding citizens of being right-wing domestic terrorists simply for being ordinary, peaceful and law abiding.
To refresh your memory, here are a couple of instances from the last few years:
- In June 2016, DHS Secretary Jeh Johnson told advisers that right-wing extremists pose just as much of a threat to the country as Islamic extremists
- In February 2015, DHS intelligence report warns of domestic right-wing terror threat
- In January 2013, the Combating Terrorism Center issued a report entitled “Challengers from the Sidelines: Understanding America’s Violent Far-Right”
- And, of course, the infamous 2009 DHS report entitled “Rightwing Extremism: Current Economic and Political Climate Fueling Resurgence in Radicalization and Recruitment”
This last example was one of the more disturbing since anything – including those garden seeds I just ordered – can be construed as acts of terrorism. It’s so diverting – tra, la, la – to go down the list of things in the DHS report that qualify me for “special attention.”
Even as far back as 2004, drills were taking place in Michigan in a mock attack on a school bus as part of a terrorism response exercise. The mock terrorists? Fanatical homeschoolers. What next, drills against radical chess club members? Extremist patrons of the New York Philharmonic?
Funny, I don’t see Homeland Security proposing drills with militant vegans attacking a McDonald’s to force everyone to eat tofu, yet DHS is consistently profiling anyone who hails from the right as an unparalleled threat.
The collective concern for the state of our economy by those of us in Flyover Country makes us guilty, according to the government, of incorporating an “aspect of an impending economic collapse to intensify fear and paranoia among like-minded individuals and to attract recruits during times of economic uncertainty.”
Yes it’s true – we’ve discussed our worries about the economy during our weekly potlucks, and everyone agrees it’s a problem. Do you see the conspiracy spreading?
What’s more disturbing is how broad a brush is being used against these so-called domestic terrorists. The Southern Poverty Law Center’s infamous “hate map” lists endless comical examples of domestic terrorists, including “radical traditional Catholicism,” “anti-LGBT,” “Christian identity” and the useful and all-encompassing “general hate.”
Now, of course, it’s getting even more absurd. When you add such vague accusations of “microaggression” and “toxic masculinity” and “trans- speciesism” – well by golly we’re all right-wing extremists. (Don’t tell me I’m not a cow! Bigot! Hater!)
People who think this way are just nuts. Oops (face palm), I just outed myself as a domestic terrorist. See what I mean?
Essentially, this is following the trend in recent years for the government to criminalize anyone who disagrees with it. It’s almost like the DHS is doing its best to turn us all into criminals who can be picked up and charged whenever it suits the government’s needs. After all, a recent survey revealed the “governing elite” thinks Americans are morons.
With federal crimes “created” out of thin air, it seems within the realm of possibility that “violators” who don’t like a political administration can have vindictive charges levied against them. It is frighteningly reminiscent of the USSR’s psychological warfare tactics in which anyone who disagreed with the Communist government was, by definition, insane and could be locked up in a psych ward.
But maybe the government is correct to be concerned. Whether our politicians are willing to admit it or not, there is a deep cauldron of suppressed anger among average citizens at the escalating abuses they’ve suffered at the hands of intrusive government goons. Everything from TSA pat downs to kick-in-the-door middle-of-the-night raids … there’s a lot of simmering resentment just waiting for the right spark to set it off.
To quote Simon Black of Sovereign Man Blog, “This is all playing out with nearly perfect historical precision. Time and time again throughout history as once great empires accelerated their declines, governments have taken steps to protect their interests against the people. In the past, they have imposed curfews, disarmed the population, curtailed civil liberties, and declared national emergencies, usually against some great faceless enemy from abroad who threatens their way of life.
“As it turns out, though, our great faceless enemy is not some mythical boogeyman living in a cave, nor some angry brown person who hates us for our freedoms … but the very people within the system who’ve taken an oath to ‘support and defend the Constitution of the United States against all enemies, foreign and domestic'” (emphasis added).
So, since the DHS report concludes by urging “recipients of this document to report information concerning suspicious or criminal activity to DHS and the FBI. … When available, each report submitted should include the date, time, location, type of activity, number of people and type of equipment used for the activity. …” – then here’s the skinny:
I ordered 14 different types of non-hybrid seeds at 1:52 p.m. on Oct. 3 from a company in Oregon, and they should be delivered next week. Our weekly neighborhood potlucks (type of equipment: propane stove) involve about 10 people and take place on Fridays at 6 p.m., alternating homes. Bring a dessert.
I expect a knock on our door any day now. If they arrive over the weekend, they’ll be able to witness me sowing my domestic terrorism in the garden. Don’t be late, boys, the garlic and potatoes onions have to get in the ground before the snow flies, and I need to sow them as soon as possible.
Media wishing to interview Patrice Lewis, please contact [email protected].
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