Is there no end to it? It seems that every breath Donald Trump takes – and certainly every tweet he writes – becomes headline news.

And those headlines are liberally (ahem) peppered with accusations of collusion, Russians, gifts, administration turmoil and now, sex – explicit and flavored with the threats of payoffs and lawsuits.

Is this really what our government should be doing? Is this really what’s important for our future? Are these “news” stories really what our media should be doing? Is this news or just low-class tabloid junk?

To paraphrase one of my favorite songs – “Mama, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Reporters.”

It all reminds me of the night years ago when I was talking to my father (who, in his old age, had grown very bitter about news and politics), and I mentioned that I was in the “media profession.”

He nearly blew a gasket: “That’s not a profession. It’s just gossip and dirt, and you’re in it!”

Uh-oh! Needless to say, that put an end to our conversation that evening!

But as it turned out, he was absolutely right, and the news business has only gotten worse in the years since. The proof is on your TV every night, on radio news and in whatever newspapers and magazines are left. It’s a sad reflection of our society, culture and government. And it doesn’t speak well for the future.

And speaking of our government, we were treated this week to David Hogg, a student who survived the Parkland, Florida, school shooting. Full of himself, he has taken up the role of savior, not only of people his age, but also of the country and our future. His speeches reek of self-importance, flavored by invective and profanities aimed at his parents’ generation and all those people in government.

Modestly, he claims, “I’m changing the world,” and he punctuates it with a Nazi-fist raised salute. (He wasn’t spanked enough as a child.)

The one good thing that came out of Hogg’s flirtation with fame was his admission that he is “annoyed” that four of his college applications have been rejected.

Hurrah! I am down on those California schools for a variety of reasons, but for whatever rationale, the fates have shined on that state, in that the applications Hogg made to UCLA, UCSD, UCSB and UC Irvine were all rejected.

What a relief! I can’t imagine what it would have been like to have that snotty kid in California for four years of college and the media suck-ups who would have trailed him every step of the way.

He says, “it’s disappointing,” but it makes no difference because “we’re already changing the world.”

I’m curious as to what exactly he has in mind.

I thought, in line with the changes he may be thinking of, I would provide him with some descriptions of governments he might find useful in his travels into history.

For that, I extend my thanks to the editor of the Western Ag Reporter (March 22, 2018), my favorite ranching newspaper.

“Politics for Dummies”

Capitalism, American style: You have two cows. You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.

Bureaucracy, American style: You have two cows. Under the new farm program, the government pays you to shoot one, milk the other, and then pour the milk down the drain.

American corporation: You have two cows. You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the second one. You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the analysts, stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses. Your stock goes up.

French corporation: You have two cows. You go on strike because you want three cows. You go to lunch and drink wine. Life is good.

Japanese corporation: You have two cows. You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce 20 times the milk. They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains. Most are at the top of their class at cow school.

Italian corporation: You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are. You break for lunch. Life is good.

Communist – politics: You have two cows. The government seizes both and provides you with milk. You wait in line for hours to get it. It is expensive and sour.

Socialist – politics: You have two cows. The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor. You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.

Democrat – politics: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. You feel guilty for being successful. You push for higher taxes so the government can provide cows for everyone.

Republican – politics: You have two cows. Your neighbor has none. So?

I hope he learned something from this, and I say, “Good luck, David Hogg. As soon as media grow tired of your antics, you’ll be left in the dust of history – which is where you belonged from the beginning.”

Please, just shut up and go away.

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