‘I am in heat’: Ashley Biden’s childhood trauma a ‘red flag’ she was molested, experts say

By Peter LaBarbera

Ashley Biden (Video screenshot)
Ashley Biden (Video screenshot)

Second of two parts

To read Part 1, “‘F***ed up NOSE’: Ashley Biden reveals her cocaine addiction and other secrets,” go HERE.

Warning: Offensive subject matter

In her personal diary – now confirmed as authentic – first daughter Ashley Biden describes memories of “sexual trauma” in her childhood that are “absolutely red flags” in terms of revealing potential child sexual abuse, according to an attorney who spent 10 years as a court-appointed guardian professionally trained to recognize signs of such abuse.

As WND reported in Part 1, Ashley, the only child of both Joe and Jill Biden, sought extensive rehab help in 2019 for her cocaine addiction at a “high-end” treatment center in Delray Beach, Florida. In the diary, a copy of which is available on Scribd, she talks about the traumas she experienced as a child, including, potentially, molestation, as she struggles to find the roots of her debilitating and persistent drug addiction.

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The diary was found at a Florida rental home in 2020 by two people who reportedly sold it to Project Veritas and were later prosecuted by the DOJ for selling stolen property following an over-the-top FBI raid on the home of James O’Keefe, then president of Project Veritas. The diary was leaked to a conservative website, Alex Jones’ National File, but recently was confirmed as authentic by Ashley Biden herself, in a recorded phone conversation Sept. 3, 2020 with a Project Veritas staffer, and released to the public by the undercover journalism outfit July 31.

Part One deals with Ashley’s startling drug addiction revelations, including that her addiction was so bad that she worried about getting what heavy users call “cocaine nose” – serious physical damage to the nose due to frequently snorting cocaine. This article, Part 2, deals with the diary’s revelations about Ashley Biden’s past sexual traumas, her reckless sexual behavior at the time she was keeping the diary, and her family dysfunction growing up. In her diary, Ashley reveals:

  • she thought she had likely experienced sexual molestation as a child, but like many child sexual abuse victims, she cannot remember the full circumstances of her predation;
  • she was “hyper-sexualized” as a child and searches for answers why: “What is this due to? Was I molested? I think so” she writes. “I can’t remember specifics but I do remember trauma.”
  • how she remembers “pulling up my skirt in 2nd grade [typically 7 or 8 years old] and showing the boys my underpants”;
  • how she remembers “beating my vagina due to overhearing parents having sex”;
  • how she recalls being “turned on when I wasn’t [supposed] to be”;
  • how as a girl she took “showers with my dad” that she said were “probably not appropriate”;
  • how Ashley remembers trying to avoid going to the bathroom as a girl, and “being wiped [by an adult] until too late in the game” (i.e., past the appropriate age).
  • how during her time in recovery, Ashley had “mind-blowing sex” with “Keith,” a married man and fellow addict in recovery she met in Florida during her time there (Ashley Biden, too, was married);
  • how her sex drive at one point was “[f***ing] out of control,” so much so that she writes: “Like literally, I am in heat.” These and other passages in the diary strongly suggest that Biden was also “sex addicted,” says one Christian counselor with vast experience in helping the recovery of child sex abuse victims;
  • how Ashley says her mother was “emotionally unavailable” growing up, but her father sent the message that “I could get love from men.”

‘Absolute red flags’

An attorney who is an expert in discerning signs of child sexual abuse, who spoke to WND on the condition of anonymity, said Ashley’s recollections – particularly the diary entries about her bathroom fears and getting wiped past the appropriate age – are “absolute red flags” for potential child sexual abuse in her life.

For sex predators, “it’s about access to the child” – in Ashley’s case, possibly an adult who uses “help” for the child as an opportunity to molest, said the source, who has a decade experience practicing family law, and who, as a certified Guardian ad Litem, is professionally trained in recognizing the signs and symptoms of sexual abuse of children.

Page from a pdf copy of Ashley Biden’s diary. In this Jan. 30, 2019 entry, she recalls being “hyper-sexualized [at] a young age,” and asks herself: “Was I molested?” and answers, “I think so.” She goes on to write that she remembers “trauma” and “having sex with friends at a young age,” and “showers [with] my dad (probably not appropriate)” (screenshot/Scribd)
“You need help [wiping], so I’m going to help,” she said, adopting the voice of the manipulative predator who trades on his or her authority to victimize the innocent child.

Children can never give consent for sexual activity (only the hard Sexual Left argues otherwise), so any such contact with a minor is by definition abusive, she said.

Another warning sign of sexual abuse, the source said, is children who “talk a lot about sexual things at a young age” or exhibit sexually aggressive behaviors that demonstrate a knowledge they should not have – such as a very young Ashley Biden encouraging boys to look up her dress.

Asked about young Ashley beating her private parts when she heard her parents having sex, she said self-harm is a “manifestation of the trauma the abuse is causing.”

Victims of child sexual abuse are “way more likely to engage in drug and alcohol abuse,” as in later life addiction becomes a “coping mechanism,” she said.

That observation is confirmed in academic literature. One 2018 study in the journal Current Psychology, titled, “The relationship between childhood trauma, early-life stress, and alcohol and drug use, abuse, and addiction: An integrative review,” found that women victimized in their childhood are more like to abuse drugs as a coping mechanism than men who were abused in their childhood. “[W]omen who reported experiencing child abuse and neglect were significantly more likely to have used illicit drugs in the past year, compared with men who reported similar childhood trauma,” it states. “[C]hildhood sexual abuse was found to predict substance abuse in women, but not for men.”

Diary a ‘huge indicator of sexual abuse’

Stephen Black

Stephen Black, a pastoral caregiver who has counseled hundreds of people in recovery from child sexual abuse, and who himself was sexually molested as a boy, told WND, “Ashley clearly communicates classic signs of behavior all through her writings that she was sexually abused. It’s pretty clear that sexual activity and abuse was normalized in her childhood.”

“Any good therapist, counselor, a pastoral caregiver with any common sense can see that Ashley is medicating terrible childhood trauma with drugs, alcohol and being sex addicted. She literally describes herself as ‘in heat,’” said Black, who has more than four decades experience “studying recovery from childhood sexual, mainly for my own personal tragic childhood sexual abuse recovery, but more importantly spending over 35 years helping other abuse victims recover.”

Black said Ashley Biden’s admission of her father, President Joe Biden, taking “probably not appropriate” showers with her as a child “is a huge indicator of childhood sexual abuse,” as is the “continued oppression revealed in her diary entries and her obvious need for further recovery,” e.g., Ashley’s own admissions of relapse after relapse.

Regarding the mix of drug addiction and “sex addiction” he finds in Ashley Biden’s diary, Black, who partied with cocaine as a teenage homosexual (he is now a Christian family man who testifies to being free from homosexuality through Jesus Christ), told WND: “Cocaine is an adrenaline rush … it’s like putting your sex drive on steroids.”

Ashley felt used by lover Kevin

The most troublesome passages in Ashley Biden’s 112-page, handwritten diary can be found on the date of Jan. 30, 2019. Ashley is still reeling from a recent sexual encounter with Kevin, a married fellow addict, that did not end well. Readers will recall that Ashley is also married, albeit unfulfilled by her own testimony, having wed Philadelphia plastic surgeon Dr. Howard Krein in 2012.

Much of the diary deals with Ashley analyzing her relationship with paramour Kevin, which provides the lead-up to the critical pages in the diary dealing with her own childhood trauma:

She writes to Kevin after the two had “mind blowing sex” together. She describes a scene in which she is driving with him: “Towards the end – your wife called and you rushed to kick me out of the car. I smoked a cigarette while you sat in the car talking to her – and I remember thinking this is a disaster. You came out and told me you had to go – could drive me home but I insisted on walking. I cried on my way back – thinking about how incredible an experience [it was] but how awful the ending felt. As if I had just been used for sex – a street walker – there was no peace in my heart.”

Although Ashley writes that the two made “the [decision] not to communicate over the holidays,” Kevin keeps texting and “sexting” her, and she reciprocates: “I hadn’t left your mind. The texts + sexting continued from there – sending each other pictures and making sweet promises. You begged me to see you the [week] of the 12th … I was conflicted – [because] I didn’t want to be ‘that’ woman to your wife. But I came back to Ocean Drive conflicted + needed to process ….”

Ocean Drive refers to Caron Ocean Drive, a “high-end” addiction treatment center in Delray Beach, Florida, which caters to affluent clientele.

Biden recounts being “ashamed of letting our business out in the open” at Ocean Drive after being told, apparently in a session, to “talk about it.” A few days before New Years (2019) Kevin starts sending her texts again in which he “began speaking sexually.”

She writes: “then [it] ended abruptly + it felt bizarrely familiar again – I felt used + thought it was selfish.”

She expresses ambivalence toward her husband, Howard: “I may not have been experiencing a good sex life [at] home but I did have a partner who thought about me + my needs before his,” writes Ashley in her “letter” to Kevin.

Kevin “sexts” her again and writes that he wants to “see me on the 12th weekend [Jan. 12, 2019],” but later when she asks about getting together, “you responded that you were conflicted + didn’t think it was best.”

Cocaine numbs the pain

“I broke down + numbed my feelings in cocaine,” Ashley writes.

Kevin keeps stringing her along and apparently writes Ashley, telling her: “You haven’t left my mind – I relapsed [and] I am ok + going to Caron [Ocean Drive facility] – no needles [likely a reference to shooting up heroin] – my wife is divorcing me. Wish you were here. I’d like to get sober + try with you….”

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It is a theme found over and over in the diary: addicts trying to break free of drug addictions only to relapse, then try again for sobriety, then relapse again. Here was Ashley Biden, from a very prominent political family, attempting to gain total abstinence from cocaine and hard drugs, with her own frequent relapses – at the end of her diary in September 2019 she exults that “it’s been a long while since I have been sober for 14 days.” Yet she was getting involved intimately with a man who himself was going back and forth between sobriety and “using.”

She yearned for stability but his life was, in her words, a “Rollercoaster”: “you telling me that ‘you were on [heroin] and had just been kicked out of your own house’ while writing me those intense texts – makes my stomach churn – feeling used. An innocent victim in your twisted/wicked games.”

‘I am here for sexual trauma’

With that sordid backdrop, Ashley Biden ends her letter to Kevin with a key passage: she was “here” – likely the Caron facility – “for sexual trauma.”

She writes to Kevin: “So where do we go from here? I have been working on letting go but I don’t want to resent you. I am here for sexual trauma and loss – both [of which] you have healed and hurt. I have a part in all of this – that is my work. How I let myself get involved with unavailable men who can’t give me what I need. Maybe this was a fantasy I created in my head. Maybe you too are like a drug – addicted to the feeling of being ‘safe’ – made by another or the fact that the sex was incredible for the first time in a long time….”

‘Literally, I am in heat’

Here begins the critical Jan. 30, 2019 entry in Ashley Biden’s diary. Surely referencing all the “Kevin” drama from that month, she writes that she is “so thankful that January is almost over.”

And then there is yet another mention of a sobriety “date” – i.e., when she vows to quit using forever – that would quickly fall apart: “1-27-19 is my date + g*d***n it [, it] better be my last,” she writes.

The diary entry continues: “I’ve had one of my hardest days – my sex drive is out of [f**k**g] control. Like literally, I am in heat. I told Kevin the truth about how I was feeling – felt exposed + vulnerable so didn’t go to dinner. Need a break from seeing him. … I erased his number from my phone – so can’t contact him unless he is to contact me which he won’t.

“I think I need to have sex in order to feel good about not having sex + get it all over with,” she writes. “Neil’s friend is a sex addict which might work out well.”

In other words, Ashley appears to be contemplating a meaningless sexual encounter with someone likely in therapy for being a sex addict, to satisfy a craving so then she can feel good about being abstinent (in that area of her life).

“I know it’s not the [healthiest] way to deal with things but [at] least it’s better than drugs,” she continues. “I am focused on myself + my needs + sex seems – [at] least at this moment to be one of them.”

‘Hypersexualized at young age’

In this portion of the diary, Ashley seems to provide a window into her life in which, perhaps, her drug addiction and disordered sexual behavior (potentially as a sex addict) merged and fed off each other.

“I don’t know if I even need to kiss a guy – just come over + [f***] me – sober,” she writes. “I think I’m going to go to the AA meeting tomorrow night. And maybe he [Kevin] will be there? Maybe not. But I have always been boy crazy.”

At this point Ashley begins to write about her abnormal sexual behavior as a kid, and how it might be rooted in sexual abuse or trauma as a young girl.

‘Was I molested? I think so’ and ‘showers with my dad’

Ashley writes: “I remember pulling up my skirt in 2nd grade [typically 7 or 8 years old] and showing the boys my underpants. Hyper-sexualized [at] a young age,” she writes. “What is this due to? Was I molested. I think so – I can’t remember specifics but I do remember trauma – I remember not liking the [Woolzack’s] house; I remember being somewhat sexualized with Caroline [likely her cousin, Caroline Biden]; I remember having sex with friends [at] a young age; showers [with] my dad (probably not appropriate); being turned on when I wasn’t [supposed] to be. I remember Q-tips – I hated getting my ears clean; beating my vagina due to overhearing parents having sex.”

She continues, asking herself in the diary: “What made me so attached?” The she offers some answers; the following is taken verbatim from the diary:

  • My mother [Jill Biden] not emotionally available – ;
  • My father was [available?] – message – “I could get love from men”;
  • “I am not your mother”;
  • Blanket being taken away;
  • Not letting myself go to the bathroom;
  • Being wiped until too late in the game –

“I could list all the reasons – But I can’t seem to find the solution,” Ashley writes.

‘F***ed up NOSE’: Ashley Biden reveals her cocaine addiction and other secrets

IMPORTANT NOTE TO WND READERS: Today's ruling elites champion policies every previous generation of Americans would have regarded as outright evil. At the top of that list would be the supremely radioactive issue – illuminated by the hit summer film "Sound of Freedom" – of the widespread trafficking and sexual slavery of children, as well as the shocking prevalence of pedophiles in the United States of America. Indeed, the U.S. is the largest market for child sexual abuse in the world.

According to Tim Ballard, who has led many missions rescuing sex-trafficked children around the world, the Biden administration actually ENABLES AND PROMOTES the trafficking and sexual slavery of children with its horrendous border policies, its push for early sexualization of children, championing children's "right to consent" on everything including mutilating transgender surgeries, and so on.

"Pedophiles are sitting back right now," says Ballard, "and going, ‘We've been pushing this agenda for decades, and now we don't have to push any more, because the left is taking care of it for us' – IN AMERICA!"

Ballard's concerns are confirmed by Tara Lee Rodas, a Health and Human Services whistleblower who recently testified before Congress that under Joe Biden, "THE U.S. GOVERNMENT HAS BECOME THE MIDDLEMAN IN A LARGE-SCALE, MULTI-BILLION-DOLLAR CHILD TRAFFICKING OPERATION."

But that's just the beginning. The whole, secret criminal mega-enterprise of child sex trafficking and the global elites' affinity for pedophilia is exposed as never before in the August issue of WND's critically acclaimed monthly Whistleblower magazine, in a groundbreaking issue titled "THE NEW AMERICAN SLAVE TRADE: How the Biden regime enables and promotes child sex trafficking in the U.S.A." WHISTLEBLOWER is available in both the popular print edition and a state-of-the-art digital version, either single issues or discounted annual subscriptions.

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