Lyin’ Biden: Joe’s oleaginous politics

By Siegfried Johnson

Absalom stole the hearts of everyone in Israel. – 2 Samuel 15:6, The Message

So smooth were Absalom’s moves that even King David could not “Stop the Steal.”

In my latest WND column – “Return, Donald! Return!” – I described Trump’s potential return to the White House as parallel to King David’s return to power after being ousted from Jerusalem by Absalom. The Hebrew Bible paints a pitiful picture of that moment, the humiliated king in camouflaged flight, ascending the Mount of Olives “weeping as he went.”

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His exile would not last long. Absalom’s demise following a brief and ineffective reign stirred the peoples’ regret for having ever supported the now obviously treasonous Absalom. Formerly anti-David elements, whose support Absalom had won over with smooth moves of flattery and lies, now urgently called for David to “Return!”

“So what are you waiting for? Why don’t you bring the king back?” They were unanimous in sending for the king: “Come back! You and all your servants.” So the king returned. – 2 Samuel 19:10, 14-15, The Message

Similarly, the 2024 presidential contest is seeing significant segments of 2020 Biden voters shifting their allegiance, openly calling for a Trump return, a phenomenon seen in polls of young people, blacks, Hispanics, Silicon Valley, swing states and more.

The Hebrew Bible’s explanation of how Absalom was able to “steal” the hearts of the people exposes slimy similarities between Absalom and Biden, both effectively employing obvious flattery, outrageous exaggeration and outright lies in order to exacerbate existing tribal divisions.

In today’s political parlance, Identity Politics.

All politicians naturally seek to identify with and gain the support of whatever audience they are addressing. Biden and his Democrat handlers, though, would make Absalom proud by taking Identity Politics to the next level.

Is his audience Puerto Rican? Biden says, “And so I was sort of raised in the Puerto Rican community at home, politically.”

To victims of the deadly fire in Hawaii? Joe identifies by melodramatically telling of his own house fire, claiming to have almost lost his ’67 Corvette, dog, cat and Jill (though, in reality, the fire was a grossly embellished small kitchen fire).

Touring a Mack Truck facility? “I used to drive an 18 wheeler, man,” he fabricates.

Speaking to Jewish leaders? “I, you might say, was raised in the synagogues of my state. You think I’m kidding, I’m not.”

Needing the LGBTQ+ vote? Joe claims to have once seen two men kiss and his dad offering a teaching moment, saying, “It’s simple, Joey. They love each other.”

A recent piece in the New York Times, “Biden Loves to Tell Tall Tales – We Cut Them Down to Size,” is predictably slanted commentary intended to give Joe a pass, seeing Biden’s smooth moves as but innocent naiveté. No need to explore the darker side of Biden’s yarns.

The Hebrew Bible’s exposing of Absalom’s flattery-based strategy provides a contrary example of how a more honest examination of Biden’s tall tales would reveal a dark side.

Day after day Absalom waited at Jerusalem’s city gate, spying out delegations coming from the various tribes as they brought their ethical and legal disputes to the king. Once their tribal affiliation was known, Absalom sprang into action, turning an insincere ear to their needs.

Then Absalom would say, “Look, you’ve got a strong case; but the king isn’t going to listen to you.”

One can easily imagine Absalom lowering his voice into a Biden-like whisper:

“Why doesn’t someone make me a judge for this country? Anybody with a case could bring it to me and I’d settle things fair and square.” Absalom did this to everyone who came to do business with the king and stole the hearts of everyone in Israel. – 2 Samuel 15:3-4, 6, The Message

Absalom’s “Strategy of Flattery” paid off, drip by drip draining away the support of the people from the once wildly popular King David.

When my baby boomer generation ranks experts in the art of flattery, Eddie Haskell wins first prize. The mere mention of his name evokes memory of a creepy, “Gee, Mrs. Cleaver, you sure look pretty today.”

If Absalom was the Eddie Haskell of the Hebrew Bible, Joe Biden is the Eddie Haskell of American politics.

Biden’s political career has been an oleaginous rubbing up against those he needs to impress, no matter how ludicrous, such as his buttery head-to-head with Pope Francis, the most recent manifestation of his sebaceous hair-sniffing invasion of personal spaces.

Yes, Absalom would be proud! Absalom’s name is derived from the Hebrew greeting, Shalom. Fittingly so, since Absalom was sort of a living “Hey-there! What-can-I-do-for-ya?” human handshake, his most casual encounters being inauthentic tools of political advancement.

Since most claim to despise flattery, how can it be that flattery works? Truth is, shrewdly employed, flattery can accomplish much. Shakespeare’s Decius says of Caesar, “But when I tell Caesar that he hates flatterers, he says he does, being then most flattered.”

In Shakespeare’s Julius Caesar, flattery was the tool Decius used to lead Caesar to his assassination.

Similarly, flattery in the service of Identity Politics is killing America. The woke ideologies of CRT and DEI amply prove daily how Identity Politics is calculated to destroy American unity, nurturing every small seed of tribal bitterness.

Over the long decades of his oily political career, Biden has learned to morph into any identity needed, beginning with his artfully crafted “Scranton Joe” persona.

I think that Biden’s Absalom-like use of obvious flattery, outrageous exaggeration and outright lies are most acutely sharpened when he speaks to African Americans:

“The first organization I ever joined was the NAACP, and I got involved in civil rights when I was 15.”

“They’re gonna put you back in chains!” Biden said to a black audience in 2012, referring to Republican Mitt Romney and Wall Street.

If you don’t vote for me over Trump, “then you ain’t black!” Biden spouts to Charlamagne tha God, a racist statement disguised as racial affiliation and support.

Smooth moves, all.

Hopefully, Americans are catching on to how Biden and the Democrats hope to once again “steal” the hearts of voters by sowing the seeds of dissension, the very heartbeat of Identity Politics.

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