My wife is pregnant, which means, besides being a proud
father-in-waiting, I get to run a lot of errands. Nothing serious, mind
you -- just your standard food-craving du jour kind of stuff.
"You know what sounds good?" my precious Lydia asked yesterday with a
sly smile creeping up her cheeks.
"No."
"Chinese!"
Off to Chang's Palace I go.
Oddly enough, while driving to pick up the MSG-riddled victuals, my
mind bounced back and forth between comedian Alan King's 1964 book,
"Help! I'm a Prisoner in a Chinese Bakery," and George W. Bush's
beleaguered ascension to the presidency.
King begins the book by saying that "we're all trapped in a Chinese
bakery of a sort.
"We're all prisoners of the new society -- or, rather, what I prefer
to call 'the system and its institutions.'" King's observation that "As
the system gets bigger, we all get a little smaller" especially came to
mind. With Bush's skin-of-the-teeth victory over Vice President Al Gore,
the crowd of those harping about his lack of legitimacy and mandate
grows and grows, while Bush's prospects for breaking through the
criticisms and calls to downplay his goals and aspirations seem to
shrink.
It seems the compassionate conservative is being heavily pressured to
work on his impersonation of a glass of lukewarm tap water -- sitting
inoffensively on the counter, neither exciting nor really disgusting
anyone in particular.
Anybody who cares about the future of freedom in America hopes that
Bush at least admits the problem: "Help! I'm a prisoner in a
middle-of-the-road, moderationist party!"
What's the answer?
As the more libertarian among us are smelling the stench of
syncretism, I can say that it is not what Bush has partly been doing
since Day 1 -- that is, blending the statist reforms of the Democrats
with GOP-approved lingo. Top-down, national education standards and
prescription drug plans for seniors, no matter the flavor of rhetoric
used to pitch them, are just small steps in America's advancing march of
socialism, not genuine reclamations of the founders' vision of
individual independence. Nationalized education and medicine -- twin
dreams of the fascist id rumbling under the seat of the Democrat mind --
are the end results of Bush's plans; as such, his "bold, conservative
agenda" is really a compromise with the devil of despotism.
Clearly, this qualifies for bad news.
But (insert hallelujahs and hosannas here) there is good news. Bush,
despite his liberal/moderate parroting has some ideas that will
genuinely help the cause of freedom. Liberating Social Security and
hacking taxes are but two. Sure, he doesn't go far enough, but half a
won-ton is better than nothing.
The trouble is, for the good angles of the Bush agenda, congressional
Dems and their bootlickers in the media will bellow until terminally
hoarse that Dubya has as much a mandate to lead as a drunk at an AA
meeting. No, they'll caution, save the radical stuff till later. Read
the pulse of the nation. Slow down. Govern down the middle, and, for
heaven's sake, don't rock the boat. All the while, moderate Republicans
will undoubtedly be singing near-perfect harmony from the Pinko Psalter.
Granted, wisdom is not usually found in fortune cookies, but Bush
should read and strongly take to heart the one I cracked open yesterday
while getting Lydia's sweet and sour and pot stickers.
"Be direct," it begins, "usually one can accomplish more that way."
I know it's not the "I Ching," but it's better than the bumfodder
most Republican strategists have been spouting lately.
If Bush really believes that privatizing Social Security and cutting
taxes are the way to go -- and let's hope he does -- he should plant a
foot in the rump of the liberal puditocracy and press onward with his
reforms. You can safely wager all the tea in China that, had Gore eked
out the win, he'd act as if Jesus Christ and the 12 apostles had
descended and personally delivered a mandate direct from heaven, stamped
with God's personal seal of approval. While Dubya, hopefully, is a
little more humble than that, he certainly should proceed with similar
confidence and courage.
Pantywaisting the presidency is the surest way for Bush to disappoint
his base and lose any chance of legacy of liberty. Boldly stepping
forward and recapturing ground stolen by the Democrats, regardless of
the opposition, is the surest way to secure American freedom. Here's
hoping Bush figures that out, soon.